Ever since she had been told she was a "four-spiritual-root good-for-nothing," Yan Luoluo was far from disheartened; instead, a blazing fighting spirit ignited within her—
"Thirty years east of the river, thirty years west of the river, do not bully a young girl into poverty!"
(Though she had no idea where this line came from, she felt it had a very special kick to it!)
Henceforth, up and down the Yan residence, the following scenes could be witnessed every day:
-Before dawn, Yan Luoluo would squat in the courtyard "meditating" (actually stealing glances at Senior Brother's abdominal muscles while he practiced his morning routine);
-During meals, she would brandish her chopsticks to simulate the "Sword Control Technique," splattering food and dishes everywhere;
-Before going to sleep, she would clench her little fists and swear an oath: "I'm going to become a big shot even more formidable than Master!"
Ye Wuchen (avatar), outwardly stern in his guidance, was inwardly holding back peals of laughter:
—How can my little apprentice be so adorable even when she's acting foolish?
By eavesdropping on the maids' idle chatter, Yan Luoluo finally figured out the spiritual root rules of this world:
1. Single Spiritual Root (Heavenly Spiritual Root):
-Cultivation speed: Airplane
-Treatment: Sects fight over you with broken heads, resources yours for the taking
-Drawback: Prone to arrogance and conceit, prone to premature death halfway through
2. Dual Spiritual Root (Earthly Spiritual Root):
-Cultivation speed: High-speed rail
-Treatment: Key cultivation target
-Drawback: Frequently compared to single spiritual rooters
3. Triple Spiritual Root (Mixed Spiritual Root):
-Cultivation speed: Train
-Treatment: Ordinary disciple, left to sink or swim
-Drawback: Neither outstanding nor mediocre
4. Quadruple Spiritual Root (Useless Spiritual Root):
-Cultivation speed: Bicycle
-Treatment: "Why haven't you quit the sect yet?"
-Drawback: Useless at everything
5. Quintuple Spiritual Root (Hùndùn Spiritual Root):
-Cultivation speed: Early stage—Walking, Late stage (off the charts)—Rocket
-Treatment: Either worshipped on an altar or assassinated
-Drawback: Surviving to the late stage counts as you winning
Inner monologue: Yan Luoluo (clenched fist) "Turns out I'm a hidden limited edition!"
One night, Yan Luoluo happened to catch Senior Brother "Chen Wuye" practicing his sword under the moonlight—
Amidst the crisscrossing sword qi, five-colored spiritual light flowed!
Yan Luoluo: "!!!"
—The five elements spiritual root?!
—Isn't this just like Master's?!
Just as she was about to rush forward and demand an explanation, a sudden flash of insight struck her mind:
Wait...
Senior Brother = Five elements spiritual root
Master = Five elements spiritual root
Senior Brother and Master never appear at the same time...
Yan Luoluo (pupils earthquake): "C-Could it be..."
Ye Wuchen noticed that his little apprentice had been acting strange lately.
—She no longer flirted with the maidservants, nor did she run off to the Liu residence, and even...
The number of times she touched his abdominal muscles had decreased!
Just as he was wondering about this, Yan Luoluo suddenly hugged her pillow and crept under his quilt:
"Senior Brother~ I'm scared of thunder, let's sleep together tonight!"
(Outside the window, the bright moon hung high)
Ye Wuchen: "......Alright."
In the darkness, Yan Luoluo suddenly asked in a low voice: "Senior Brother, if you possessed the five elements spiritual root, would you tell others?"
Ye Wuchen stiffened all over.
—His cover blown?!
"No, because there's no need to bring trouble upon oneself." Ye Wuchen spoke calmly, his eyes as deep as the night, his voice carrying a trace of unquestionable chill.
"Why is that?" Yan Luoluo tilted her head, her eyes filled with incomprehension, "I flipped through the ancient texts in Father's study today, and it clearly states that "the five elements spiritual root is the endowment of heaven's selection, a millennium-rare rarity." Isn't this a genius among geniuses?"
Ye Wuchen let out a soft sigh, his slender fingers gently tapping the tabletop. "What the books say is true, but precisely because of that, it must be concealed all the more." He raised his eyes to look at her, his gaze sharp as a blade. "You will never know how terrifying human jealousy can be—even among the closest of kin."
"But... shouldn't parents and friends be happy for their children?" Yan Luoluo blinked, still retaining a hint of innocence.
"No." Ye Wuchen sneered, "They will only think—'Why you? Why not me?' Jealousy gnaws at the human heart like a venomous snake, and in the end, your spiritual root will instead become your death warrant."
"Is it because, like the books say... the spiritual root will be dug out?" Yan Luoluo's voice trembled slightly.
"Yes." Ye Wuchen's gaze grew even colder. "Raw excavation—while you are fully conscious, carving out your spiritual root inch by inch, making you wish you were dead yet unable to die."
"Those people... are so pitiful..." Yan Luoluo shrank her neck, a trace of fear welling up in the depths of her eyes.
"Mhm." Ye Wuchen responded indifferently and said no more.
Yan Luoluo stared blankly at her own Senior Brother (Master), as a flash of inspiration suddenly crossed her mind—"Ye Wuchen," why was this name so familiar?
Her eyes widened abruptly, her heart pounding wildly.
Isn't this that dog-blood cultivation novel she read many years ago?!
The third male lead in the book was precisely named **Ye Wuchen**. Because of his unrequited obsessive love for the female lead, he ultimately fell into the demonic path, turning dark and deranged. And upon discovering that he possessed the **Hùndùn Spiritual Root**, the female lead had personally dug out his spiritual root while he was still alive and transplanted it to the male lead.
As for herself...
Yan Luoluo's mouth twitched; her character was even more miserable than the third male lead!
In the original story, she was an utterly insignificant cannon fodder character, forcibly shoved into the imperial palace as the crown prince's consort due to a family marriage alliance, only to be tested and found to be a **useless quadruple spiritual root**, earning the crown prince's aversion. Afterwards, her family was implicated in the affair, and the entire clan was wiped out.
Yet in reality—she was no good-for-nothing at all!
Her spiritual root was the one-in-a-million **Hùndùn Spiritual Root**, simply undetected at first. It was only after her family was savagely slaughtered that, amidst extreme grief and indignation, the aura of her spiritual root finally erupted completely.
However, this instead became her death warrant.
The female lead's master—that hypocritical old bastard, coveting her spiritual root, feigned taking her as his disciple, only to personally slice open her dantian on some dark and windy night, dig out her spiritual root, and replace it into the female lead!
Oh right, that old bastard was also the female lead's number one simpering dog.
The more Yan Luoluo thought about it, the more nauseated she felt, because this novel she had read, **Immortal Path Carefree**, was not any proper cultivation literature at all, but rather an **extremely lewd and explicit harem wish-fulfillment novel**!
The female lead slept her way through all the important characters in the book, from Master to Senior Brother, from Demon Lord to Immortal Emperor, and didn't even spare the spiritual beasts! Except for the third male lead Ye Wuchen...
That's right, literally "didn't spare him"!
When Yan Luoluo had read halfway through back then, she was so sickened by this utterly bottomless plot that she directly started a furious long thread ranting three thousand words, dragging both the author and the female lead onto the trending searches.
Because she discovered that most of the plots here were plagiarized by that author from a short story she had already published five years ago.
And that scapegoat author had two people: herself, and her friend...
While the plagiarist was the girl who had tried to bully her in middle school...
When reading this dog-blood novel back then, Yan Luoluo had found it strange why her own such niche name could appear in the book, only to find out later that it was the work of that bully!
...And as a result, she had now transmigrated into the most miserable cannon fodder in this book?!
Yan Luoluo took a deep breath, roaring inwardly—
What kind of hellish starting setup is this?!
At noon the next day, Yan Luoluo sat cross-legged on a rush mat, biting her fingernails in utter puzzlement. She clearly remembered going through the proper reincarnation procedure down in the Underworld—though that "proper" probably had to be taken with a grain of salt.
After all, which proper reincarnation kicks over Meng Po's soup first, accidentally beats up three Underworld Emissary s, and finally has those ghosts directly revolt! Thinking of this, Yan Luoluo guiltily touched her nose. Even so, they shouldn't have thrown her into a novel!
"What is this supposed to be?" she muttered under her breath, "Retaliation from the Underworld?"
Meanwhile, inside Fengdu City—
"What on earth is going on here!" King Yama's roar shook the main hall's beams and pillars until they trembled. "How can a senior soul-reaping emissary trained for three hundred years make such a low-level mistake?!"
The judge wiped the cold sweat from his forehead and tremblingly handed over a volume of the Book of Life and Death radiating golden light: "Y-Your Lordship... You'd better inspect it yourself..."
King Yama snatched the register, and when he saw the name "Yan Luoluo," his pupils shrank violently. The lifespan value, which should have been sixty or seventy years, had now turned into an infinity symbol, with dazzling golden light flickering right beside it.
Even more shockingly, a line of small, hot-stamped gold characters had appeared out of thin air next to her name:
【Ye Wuchen (Predestined Marriage)】
Below that was also a line of vermilion imperial remarks:
【My daughter's good match lies in that realm, borrowing a lapse of yours for use】
"T-This is..." King Yama's hands trembled slightly.
The judge swallowed hard: "My Lord, it seems we didn't reap the wrong soul... It was Heavenly Dao himself..."
"Shut up!" King Yama slammed the Book of Life and Death shut, his expression shifting unpredictably. He finally understood why all magical artifacts had been ineffective against that lass when she wreaked havoc in the Underworld.
"Pass down the order," King Yama took a deep breath. "Let this matter be dropped here; no one is allowed to mention it again. Also..." he lowered his voice, "record a special-class merit for that young lady in the Book of Life and Death, and just say... just say she helped straighten out the discipline of the Underworld."
The judge's mouth twitched: "Then those Underworld Emissary s she beat..."
"Just say they were conducting riot control drills!" King Yama slapped the desk. "Hurry up! Unless you want to be reassigned to cleaning toilets tomorrow!"
At this moment, Yan Luoluo, who was practicing cultivation, suddenly sneezed.
"Strange," she rubbed her nose, "who's talking about me?"
Ye Wuchen glanced at her indifferently: "Focus."
"I know, I know~" Yan Luoluo stuck out her tongue, but thought to herself: Once I achieve great mastery in my cultivation, I'll definitely march back to the Underworld to demand an explanation!
(Ghosts of the Underworld: Begging you to spare us!!!)
Yan Luoluo was completely unaware that ever since this little butterfly flapped her wings, the original plot had unraveled to the point where even the biological author wouldn't recognize it. At this moment, Daddy Heavenly Dao was sitting cross-legged in the clouds, admiring with self-satisfaction the good show he had personally orchestrated.
"Hmph, that fickle-minded so-called female lead is even worthy of touching my son-in-law?" Heavenly Dao snorted coldly, flicking his fingertip as a wisp of golden light plunged into the void.
Speaking of this matter made him angry—the female lead in the original book was simply a walking hormone, wanting to dual cultivate with any handsome guy she laid eyes on. To preserve Ye Wuchen's chastity, Heavenly Dao had no choice but to bite the bullet and arrange for him to die by having his spiritual root dug out in the novel. Although the method was a bit ruthless, it at least preserved his son-in-law's virginity!
"Tragic as it was," Heavenly Dao muttered while stroking his non-existent beard, "still better than being defiled by that woman."
Now everything was fine; his own biological daughter Yan Luoluo had transmigrated into the book, and Heavenly Dao could finally hold his head high in pride. He happily flipped through the new script:
First, cancel the son-in-law's tragic death ending
Second, abolish the female lead's protagonist halo
Third... *cough cough*, have Ye Wuchen properly raise his own daughter and strive for early dual cultivation!
"Perfect!" Heavenly Dao snapped his fingers, but suddenly remembering something, quickly added another stroke to the Book of Life and Death: 【Ye Wuchen's mandatory courses: The Three Obediences and Four Virtues, Parenting Heart Sutra, Dual Cultivation Guide】
Meanwhile, Ye Wuchen, who was currently instructing Yan Luoluo in her cultivation, suddenly shuddered, feeling that something somewhere was not quite right...
"Senior Brother? Why are you blushing?" Yan Luoluo tilted her head, curiously poking his reddened earlobe.
"......"
(Ye Wuchen: Why do I suddenly have this overwhelming feeling of being thoroughly arranged?)