"Um, Consort Li! I'm a bit exhausted today... How about another day?" What the hell! I almost drowned trying to save her, and I was unconscious for three whole days! How was a half-dead man lying in bed supposed to entertain her?
This little hussy seemed to be a bimbo with a big chest and no brain... Unlike that Empress surnamed Murong, who looked like—wait, why was I suddenly starting to feel a little bit sorry for that icy beauty, Empress Murong?
Consort Li snuggled into my arms, a pair of delicate hands like tender willow shoots wrapping around my neck, staring at me with those oversized cartoonish eyes as if she wanted to devour me alive. I hurriedly pushed her away from my arms, retreated a bit, and tightly wrapped myself in the quilt from the chest up.
I looked rather like someone about to be violated... "Um, Consort Li! I really am tired today. I only just finished reading the memorials, and you know how much brainpower reviewing memorials takes. So, I need to get some proper rest!"
Were all the concubines in this imperial harem like wolves and tigers? If a concubine like Little Green Tea showed up every single night, oh lord! I'd rather just drop dead!
"Your Majesty, what is wrong with you? You were never like this before. In the past, you couldn't wait for your concubine to come to your bedchamber day and night. Today, why have you suddenly changed?" Well, even Little Green Tea was asking a question like that; it seemed the former emperor really was a total piece of trash! No, why was I cursing myself? I was the Emperor of Longxia State now!
Besides, what kind of good guy was the old emperor anyway? With so many pretty flower buds in the harem, how could he lavish all his favor on just one person? He probably had never learned the phrase "spreading the rain and dew evenly"......
"Your Majesty, Your Majesty..." Eunuch Gui walked in again, and upon seeing Consort Li present, he was momentarily stunned.
Still, he stepped forward and bowed. Seeing him felt like meeting my savior, and I immediately scrambled out of bed to hide behind Eunuch Gui. When Consort Li took a step forward, I would drag Eunuch Gui back a few paces, or simply push him to the front to block this Little Green Tea.
This scene looked precisely like playing the old game of the hawk catching the chickens...
I was having a great time, completely immersed in the game. Right at that moment, a warm, large hand lightly patted my shoulder. "What kind of nonsense are you up to again, Your Majesty?" The voice was deep and magnetic, yet carried a rather rigid tone.
I whipped my head around and caught sight of an extremely handsome outline, the lines of his face looking as though they had been meticulously and deliberately carved by the Goddess Nüwa herself: a high bridge of the nose, eyes as deep as the ocean, and a slender, fair face. Why could someone look so good? (Though compared to my current appearance, he was still just a tiny bit inferior! I thought complacently to myself.)
"It's you?"
I pulled the man who had just patted my shoulder off to the side and asked in a low voice, "Yan Ling, how did you manage to get reincarnated too? Could it be that you committed suicide to follow me in death?"
"Your Majesty, what is the matter with you now?" The person before me looked completely bewildered by my question, staring at me in disbelief as if he were looking at some kind of monster!
Hey! Why didn't he match the secret code? Could it be that he wasn't my boyfriend from my past life? I had actually been secretly rejoicing that I could rekindle our romance with Yan Ling in this lifetime.
Wait, why was he still two or three centimeters shorter than me? "Uh, uh, uh... What the hell!" I completely failed to control the panic in my heart and voice, and the sound seemed exceptionally jarring within the spacious palace!
Oh my sweet heavens! I was a man now, a full-grown, upright man, and this... was a complete disaster! It looked like there was absolutely no hope of picking up where Yan Ling and I left off.
"Your Majesty, what has gotten into you?" The man who looked so much like Yan Ling took a few steps closer, facing me directly. That face of his was really good-looking! I started falling for him again. Good lord, I needed to wipe away my drool; this was too humiliating... I was a strapping fellow nine spans tall now, how could I? Anyway, no matter what, I couldn't let myself lose an ounce of flesh over this man who looked like Yan Ling. Just think about those men who transitioned into women—taking estrogen and having their balls chopped off... Tsk tsk tsk! So painful, so painful.
I couldn't help but shiver, calmed my thoughts, and replied, "Nothing, I'm fine."
"Your Majesty, you are always so cynical and frivolous; exactly when will you ever grow up?" The two sword-like brows on his handsome face were almost knitting together. Haha! A unibrow, which reminded me of my favorite Mr. Zhou Shuren......
"Me, how am I being cynical and frivolous?"
"Right, and who are you anyway? Why aren't you sleeping in the middle of the night, coming to my bedchamber for what?" I was full of suspicion. Did people in ancient times not need to sleep? First it was that Prime Minister named Mùróng Zhuó waiting outside the hall for me to review memorials, and now here came another one. Why were they so fond of knocking on people's doors in the middle of the night—no, patting people's shoulders? Were they trying to slap out the two protective flames on the shoulders of us little emperors so they could inherit my Longxia State and then inherit my wives and concubines?
Before the handsome man could answer, Eunuch Gui shuffled over with a stoop and reminded me in a low voice, "Your Majesty, he is Prime Minister Mùróng Zhuó! Have you even forgotten your childhood study companion?"
So, he was Mùróng Yān's biological brother, the brother of that cold-beauty empress... No wonder, an iceberg pair—no wonder they were biological siblings! Come to think of it, Yún Zhāo, did this little emperor dig up the graves of the Mùróng family's past eighteen generations in his past life? Marry an iceberg-faced wife, make her iceberg-faced brother his childhood study companion, and then grow up to make this block of ice his prime minister—what kind of wicked hobby was this?
I was still pondering whether to find an excuse to fire this Mùróng Zhuó when he interrupted my thoughts. "Your Majesty, you are already nearing the age of fifteen, and you should learn to be a bit more steady and composed. As a sovereign, you must hold the world in your heart and stop being a ruler who neglects state affairs for frivolous pursuits!" He sounded entirely like my high school head teacher! I wasn't his student; a dignified ruler was being lectured like this by him—didn't I have any pride?
"You, you good Mùróng Zhuó..." I rolled up my sleeves, ready to go up and pick a fight with him. He hurriedly stepped back a few paces, bowed respectfully, and incidentally retrieved a memorial from the wide sleeve of his official robe.
Good mother in heaven! More memorials? Again, and again... Annoying to death, endless memorials to review.
Eunuch Gui hurriedly stepped forward to take the memorial from his hands and respectfully presented it to me. I opened it, and my fury instantly flared. Although I only recognized a few characters, that was quite enough. The memorial had only a few sparse strokes, but they were as tragic as blood and tears. Those little bastards of the Yuezhi tribe actually kept invading the borders of my Longxia State, burning, killing, looting, and committing every conceivable atrocity.
Damn it all, it reminded me of the time the little devils slaughtered thirty thousand of my compatriots in Jinling... No, the bloodline of the descendants of Huaxia must awaken; I had to crush those Yuezhi bastards.
"Though a hundred battles in the yellow sand wear out golden armor, I will never return until Loulan is smashed."