Li Rufeng spent the entire night racking his brains and finally came up with what he considered a "brilliant" idea. By noon the next day, the market was already packed with people waiting to see how Li Rufeng would brew fine wine using a jade bottle.
Li Rufeng walked forward full of confidence, pulling a bunch of bizarre items from his tunic: various colored powders and several small bottles filled with unknown liquids. He carefully placed the jade bottle on the table, dumped all the powders in at once, and then added a few drops of liquid from the small bottles.
The onlookers stared curiously at the jade bottle, having no idea what he was up to. The Imperial Guard stood vigilantly to the side, guarding against any unexpected trouble.
As Li Rufeng stirred the contents of the jade bottle, he muttered under his breath, "This is my carefully formulated exclusive recipe. Once Your Majesty drinks it, she will surely praise it endlessly."
The Empress sat to one side with a calm expression, though her eyes held a hint of anticipation and scrutiny. Just as Li Rufeng thought the job was done and prepared to hand the jade bottle to the Empress, the bottle suddenly emitted a gurgling sound accompanied by bursts of heat. Before anyone could react, with a loud "bang," the jade bottle actually exploded! A multicolored liquid sprayed out like fireworks, splattering everyone nearby from head to toe. The Empress did not escape either; her gorgeous robes were covered in strange liquids, and some powder hung in her hair, making her look utterly disheveled.
The market instantly plunged into chaos. The townspeople screamed and scrambled for cover, some crying out in pain as the liquid splashed into their eyes. The Imperial Guard rushed forward, shielding the Empress behind them.
"Li Rufeng, what do you think you are doing?!" the Empress demanded, trembling with rage and shouting angrily.
Li Rufeng was also terrified by the sudden explosion, standing frozen in place at a loss for words. He stammered, "Your Majesty, I... I don't know how this happened either. I clearly followed the recipe; this wine should have tasted great..."
A vegetable-selling auntie looked at the stains all over her body and said, between laughter and tears, "This Li Rufeng always manages to pull off earth-shattering antics. My brand-new clothes are completely ruined."
The Woodcutter Uncle wiped his face and shook his head helplessly, "This kid is both exasperating and amusing."
Just then, a child darted out from the crowd, pointed at Li Rufeng, and laughed loudly, "Look at him, he looks like a colorful cat!" Only then did everyone notice that Li Rufeng's face was also covered in various colored liquids, making him look like a comical clown.
Seeing Li Rufeng's appearance, and then looking at her own disheveled state, the Empress couldn't help letting out a chuckle. Seeing the Empress laugh, the people around her started laughing too, and the previously tense atmosphere instantly relaxed.
After laughing for a good while, the Empress finally stopped and said to Li Rufeng, "Li Rufeng, oh Li Rufeng, you really know how to open my eyes. However, you clearly haven't completed the task of brewing fine wine. But considering that all this fuss of yours brought everyone plenty of amusement, I will give you one last chance."
Hearing this, Li Rufeng quickly dropped to his knees and kowtowed, "Thank you, Your Majesty..."
The Empress smiled slightly and said, "For this final test, at this same time tomorrow, you must use the simplest ingredients here in the market to make a dish that everyone can enjoy. If you fail again, you will certainly not be spared!"
Hearing this, Li Rufeng secretly groaned inside. How on earth was he going to pass this final test?
After receiving this final task, Li Rufeng was so worried he couldn't sleep a wink all night. The next day, he arrived early at the market and, gazing at the dazzling array of stalls, wrung his brains trying to figure out what simple ingredients to use to make a delicious dish.
Suddenly, his eyes lit up as they locked onto a tofu stall. He thought to himself that tofu was a common item, and if prepared well, it might just satisfy everyone. So, he bought a few blocks of tofu, along with some greens, chopped scallions, and sauce from the neighboring stalls.
Li Rufeng found a temporary stove and set to work. First, he cut the tofu into small pieces, pan-fried them in the pot until both sides turned golden brown, tossed them together with the greens, and finally sprinkled them with scallions and drizzled his custom sauce over the top. Before long, a simple dish of stir-fried tofu and greens was ready, sending out an appetizing aroma.
People in the market gathered around, curiously looking at the dish. Li Rufeng confidently invited everyone to taste it, and after trying it, the townspeople gave him thumbs-up all around.
"This tofu is crispy on the outside and tender on the inside, the taste is really good!" praised an elderly man.
"Indeed, who would have thought such simple ingredients could make something so delicious," an auntie chimed in.
The Empress also stepped forward to take a bite and nodded slightly, "Mm, the flavor really is quite good. Li Rufeng, you've passed this final test."
Hearing this, Li Rufeng was overjoyed and hurriedly expressed his gratitude. Not wanting to invite any more complications, he turned and tried to sneak away while everyone was still busy enjoying the food.
However, running too hastily and failing to watch the vegetable stall ahead, he crashed straight into it. The vegetable stand was knocked to pieces, sending all kinds of vegetables rolling across the ground. Li Rufeng himself was sent spinning with dizziness and fell flat on his face with a thud, knocking himself out cold.
The surrounding crowd was stunned by the spectacle, which was immediately followed by a burst of uproarious laughter.
"This Li Rufeng, the moment he finishes his task he rushes off, only to knock himself out," a soldier said with a laugh.
Deputy General Mei Yuxin shook her head helplessly and walked forward to check on Li Rufeng's condition, "This kid is always so rash."
The Empress couldn't help laughing either, saying, "This Li Rufeng cleared all the hurdles along the way, only to knock himself out at the very end."
Everyone scrambled in a panic to lift Li Rufeng up, pinching his philtrum and splashing him with water. After quite a while, Li Rufeng slowly regained consciousness. Looking around at the crowd, he asked with a blank expression, "Where... where am I?" Seeing this, everyone burst into laughter all over again.
Once he came to, Li Rufeng rubbed his head awkwardly and tried to sneak away again. Looking at him, the Empress called out with a smile, "Li Rufeng, don't rush off just yet. Seeing as you are so quick-witted, why don't you stay in the palace and work for me?"
Hearing this, Li Rufeng's just-cleared head buzzed again, and he thought to himself, "This won't do at all. I finally managed to escape the fate of being a soldier, I cannot let myself be kept here."
Realizing the Empress wanted to keep him in the palace to serve, Li Rufeng's heart skipped a beat as his mind raced for a way out. Suddenly, an idea struck him, and he said loudly, "Your Majesty, I am deeply honored by your favor, but I am still not confident in my own abilities. I hear that General Mei Yuxin is exceptionally skilled in martial arts. If I can defeat her in a duel, I will willingly stay in the palace to serve Your Majesty; otherwise, I must beg Your Majesty to let me return home."
Hearing this, the Empress looked at Li Rufeng with growing interest, then glanced at Mei Yuxin, and smiled, "Very well, this sounds amusing. Mei Yuxin, you shall spar with him, and stop at the first sign of a winner."
Taking her order, Mei Yuxin strode gracefully into the center of the arena, drew her sword, and said to Li Rufeng, "Li Rufeng, don't regret this. I won't hold back."
Putting on a brave face, Li Rufeng picked up a tree branch to use as a weapon, struck a stance, and said, "General Mei, offense no offense!"
As soon as the duel began, Li Rufeng flailed about like a headless fly, wildly swinging his branch. Mei Yuxin easily dodged his attacks, occasionally tapping Li Rufeng lightly with her scabbard, sending the surrounding spectators into fits of laughter.
"Li Rufeng, are you having a martial arts duel or dancing?" teased a soldier.
His face flushed red from the mockery, Li Rufeng panicked and threw everything he had into the fight. Spotting an opening, he lunged furiously toward Mei Yuxin, hoping to trap her sword with his branch.
Mei Yuxin never expected Li Rufeng to pull such a move, and failing to dodge in time, the two of them collided head-on. With a sharp "bang," their heads crashed heavily together, sending stars flashing across their eyes as they both collapsed to the ground, fainting simultaneously with a dull thud.
The market instantly fell silent, everyone stunned dumb by this unexpected turn of events. After a long moment, uproarious laughter erupted.
"These two actually managed to knock themselves out! Too funny!" an auntie laughed until tears streamed down her face.
The Woodcutter Uncle shook his head while laughing, "This Li Rufeng always manages to come up with the most bizarre ways to duel."
The Empress couldn't help laughing either, saying, "These two really leave one at a loss whether to laugh or cry. Someone, carry them aside to rest."
Everyone scrambled to carry Li Rufeng and Mei Yuxin off to the side, pinching their philtrums and splashing them with water once again. After a while, Mei Yuxin was the first to regain consciousness. Rubbing her head and seeing Li Rufeng knocked out beside her, she felt a mix of exasperation and amusement.
After another moment, Li Rufeng also woke up. Looking at the crowd around him and Mei Yuxin by his side, he smiled awkwardly, "General Mei, my apologies. I didn't mean to."
Mei Yuxin cast a sidelong glance at him, "You fellow, don't you dare come up with this kind of duel method next time."
The Empress walked over, looked at Li Yuxin, and smiled, "Li Rufeng, your style of dueling certainly is unique. Now tell me, what should we do with you?"