Watching the segments being torn to shreds by Xiao Sese, Director Wang silently instructed his assistant to buy him some blood pressure medication.
Aside from Xiao Sese, the other guests were either well-mannered or too image-conscious, making their gameplay quite conventional. By 6:00 PM, Director Niu gathered everyone for dinner, and the group returned to the small pavilion. The set had not been changed much; a large screen had simply been set up to display fan interactions.
On a long, makeshift table, seven or eight dishes were laid out. Staring at the garlic broccoli, stir-fried lettuce, cold shredded celery, vinegar-soaked peanuts, smashed cucumbers, and stir-fried asparagus, the group fell into deep thought. The veteran artists, Meng Lian and Guan Ying, remained composed, their faces fixed in polite smiles. The younger, more impulsive ones, however, couldn't hide their suspicious expressions.
"This... this is it?"
Wang Qiang’s tone was as incredulous as it could possibly be. Even though the filming location was a small fishing village, wasn’t this a bit too extreme?
[The director is pocketing the sponsorship money and not doing his job!]
[Exactly! Wang Qiang is still young; he’s still growing.]
[Forget the celebrities; even a normal person would find this menu too skimpy, right?]
[This is way too vegetarian.]
Xiao Sese’s gaze happened to sweep over that last comment. "Isn't it too vegetarian? Anything I say is meatier than this spread."
[Ahhh! Xiao Sese saw my comment!!]
[So she really can see them! I thought it was just a show effect! Sisters, let's go!]
[Xiao Sese, get out of the entertainment industry!]
[Xiao Sese, get out of the entertainment industry!]
[Xiao Sese, get out of the entertainment industry!]
[Get the spammers out first.]
"Ahem, alright, teachers, please take your seats," Director Wang’s voice rose at the perfect moment.
No sooner had he finished speaking than Wang Qiang and Li Shuer lunged forward, grabbing Xiao Sese by the left and right to pull her into a seat. Xiao Sese’s eyes widened. What was happening?!
Wang Qiang flashed a grin, showing a mouthful of white teeth, and laughed foolishly. "Sister Xiao, I’m counting on your jokes to help me get through this meal!"
Li Shuer added, "Me too! I think Teacher Xiao is really interesting; I want to sit close to you."
[Help! A sunny 185-tall puppy, let me pet him!]
[The person above, clarify what exactly you want to pet?]
[Shushu is such a sweet girl, I want to sit close to her too.]
[Honestly, if my office had a team-building event, I’d be happy to sit next to an interesting person like Xiao Sese.]
...
Once everyone was seated, Director Wang’s voice rang out again. "Everyone, are you satisfied with the food in front of you?"
Xiao Sese asked, "Was this intentionally specified by the production team?"
Director Niu replied, "Uh? The general direction was set by the program, but the details were handled by the kitchen staff."
"Tsk, tsk, tsk~" Xiao Sese looked at Director Wang behind the camera with an expression of pity. "Director Wang, is it possible that the staff in charge of the menu is trying to convey something to you subtly?"
"Huh? What do you mean?"
"Nothing special. I just think you must have a lot of friends."
The live chat exploded:
[Pfft! Hahahahahaha!]
[That’s brutal!]
[What a sea of green~~~]
Director Wang, finally catching on, clutched his chest instinctively, his face turning the color of pig liver. The assistant director, seeing this, quickly moved to the next segment.
"Ahem, the production team has prepared local delicacies for you, but we need to play a game first. The screen in front of you will scroll through real-time comments, which are questions from netizens directed at one of you. After that teacher answers, the audience will vote to decide whether you win the dish. First up, Squirrel Mandarin Fish!"
As the assistant director finished speaking, a dish with an enticing color and mouth-watering aroma was pushed in front of them. As the screen scrolled, a comment stopped right in the middle.
[Question for Song Beichen: What color are your underwear today?]
Song Beichen: ...
Director Wang: ...
Everyone: ...
Xiao Sese: "Hahahahaha!"
Amidst Xiao Sese’s uninhibited laughter, Song Beichen, his face darkened, spat out two words: "Grey."
Xiao Sese stopped laughing instantly, her expression turning stern, changing faster than a Sichuan opera mask. "Oh? Really?"
Song Beichen was exasperated. "What do you mean by that?"
"Exactly what I said! They say hearing is believing, but seeing is proof. If you don't show us, how do we know if you're lying?"
"Why would I lie about something like this? Are you just like yourself, full of lies?"
Hearing this, Xiao Sese stood up and made a big "X" with her arms in front of her chest. "Nonono! I never lie, because I am your internet live pizza!"
Wang Qiang frowned from the side, sensing something unusual. "Wait a minute! Live pizza? Isn't it 'Living Bodhisattva'?"
"Big NO! A Bodhisattva might turn a blind eye, but a pizza only comes in 8, 10, or 12 slices—never 7!"
Everyone: "..."
Eventually, under Xiao Sese's relentless prodding, Song Beichen, blushing with shame, pulled at the waistband of his underwear.
Xiao Sese yawned. "Boring. I thought it would be a thong."
*Snap.*
Song Beichen let go, and the waistband of his underwear slapped loudly against his backside. But why did it feel... like it had slapped his face instead?
Wang Qiang’s internal monologue: *Hurry, hurry! What is the saddest thing in this life?!!!*
Li Shuer’s internal monologue: *Help! If I hold this in any longer, I’m going to get wrinkles!!!*
Meng Lian: "Pfft... haha~ Sorry, I just remembered it’s my son’s birthday today."
The chat was also blowing up with "hahahas."
[I've lived long enough to see this! A popular male celebrity showing his underwear to me online!]
[This is what I deserve for sneaking a look at the stream during a meeting!!]
[I’m with Xiao Sese on this one! She is my goddess!]
"Alright, now please, netizens, cast your votes. You have 20 seconds. If more than half the voters agree, you win the dish."
In the final vote, Song Beichen passed with flying colors. Director Wang rubbed his forehead and clicked on the next comment.
[Question for Goddess Guan Ying: What are you willing to give up for your child?]
The camera zoomed in on Guan Ying. Her entire being seemed to radiate with maternal love. She spoke slowly with a gentle smile: "I could give up this stage, or even my life!"
[Wait! What just flashed in my eyes! Oh! It's the radiance of motherhood!]
[I won't be able to wait for this pregnancy; Goddess, let us know when you're going for the second one. I'll go die and see if I can make it in time.]
...
In this round, Guan Ying naturally won a meat dish.
The screen continued to scroll and finally settled on a line of verse in a rather classical style.
[They say celebrities have no culture, so let's see how that goes. I’ll provide the first half of a couplet; let’s see who can complete it. "Mountain high is steep, mountain low is gentle, mountain green brings forth the beauty of Yue." Come on, show us!]
The guests bowed their heads in thought, none of them wanting to miss this golden opportunity to establish an "intellectual" persona. Xiao Sese knew perfectly well that this person was a hired troll from the Falling Stone Company. In the original plot, Song Beichen had memorized ten answers in advance, specifically to build his reputation as a scholar.
Shi Youran looked at Song Beichen, who wore an expression of absolute certainty—practically screaming, "I’ve got the answer, ask me!"—and gently chimed in.
"I remember Beichen scored over 600 on his college entrance exam~ This level of question should be a piece of cake for you, right?"
Song Beichen wore a confident smile and cleared his throat theatrically. Just as he was about to start showing off, a female voice cut in.
"Water clear is shallow, water black is deep, water green brings forth the beauty of Chu."
?! !!!!!
Everyone turned toward the sound and saw that it was Xiao Sese.
"Chu... beauty of Chu?"
Meng Lian stiffened. "Is it... the one I'm thinking of?"
"Probably? Haven't you watched the *Mountain Village* series?"
"..."
Help! Who understands the feeling of being on a variety show and having your worst nightmare dredged up again?!
The chat went wild as well, with people starting to make outrageous claims.
[This sister has both madness and culture!]
[I was just about to go for a swim, but now I’ve stopped dead in my tracks.]
[Am I the only one who thinks the "Beauty of Chu" still has charm?]
[I'm Gen Z, I don't really get this meme, I'm just anxious.]
[To the person above, search it up; it's a very... beautiful love story.]
[Hahaha, you didn't let him off the hook either!]