What a massive social execution scene!
Jiang Cheng wondered if his luck had simply been terrible lately, deciding that tomorrow he absolutely had to find a street fortune teller and get a protective amulet to wear.
Speaking of Bai Moli, she was hardly a stranger—she was the daughter of Li Lan, the best friend of Jiang's mother, Li Xiue.
They had grown up together as childhood sweethearts.
Yet there was no touching romance to speak of, nor any of the adorable, playful charm of two little porcelain dolls.
For Jiang Cheng, growing up alongside Bai Moli had been the darkest chapter of his life!
At age three, he lost a fistfight to Bai Moli, handing over his first blood.
At four, he lost another fistfight to Bai Moli, surrendering a double kill.
At five, Bai Moli secured a triple kill.
At six, looking to pull off something big, Jiang Cheng rallied a few of his best bros to jump in together, only for Bai Moli to score an ace and wipe them all out.
At eight, Jiang Cheng changed tactics, upholding the principle that a real man does not hit women. As a result, Jiang Cheng lost a shouting match with Bai Moli.
At nine, Jiang Cheng lost another shouting match with Bai Moli.
...
Right up until the present day, their annual verbal showdown ended in defeat for Jiang Cheng every single year!
Moreover, after entering university, the two of them ended up at the same school.
The moment Jiang Cheng founded the Xiaocheng Literature Society, Bai Moli countered by founding the Anti-Cheng Society.
Whenever members of the Xiaocheng Literature Society published articles or stories, she would rip into them from every conceivable angle.
The kicker was that her critiques were so spot-on that even the authors being roasted felt her angles and approaches were oddly satisfying—the kind of roasting that actually left you wanting more.
How infuriating was that!
What a humiliation, being ridden roughshod by a woman for sixteen years!
Disregarding his first three years of life before he formed any real memories, round that up, and Jiang Cheng had spent his entire conscious existence being sat on by this woman!
And this year, the battle seemed over before it had even begun.
The enemy had secured his humiliating photos—and quite possibly videos as well. With such a weapon of mass destruction in her hands, his foreseeable college career was completely doomed.
The old man sparks a youthful frenzy, yet dies before his campaign even begins.
Only with gray hair does one regret caving in, yet he dies before his campaign can even begin.
I gather the bold valor of the four seas in my chest, carrying the majesty of the great mountains upon my shoulders, yet alas, I die before my campaign even begins!
Meanwhile, upon catching sight of Jiang Wan'er beside them, Bai Moli instantly transformed into an innocent next-door neighbor, slipping her arm around Wan'er's and sitting down: "Oh my, I didn't see Sister Wan'er here! No wonder—I was just thinking I've never seen this dog of a Jiang Cheng act like that around anyone except you."
With that, she lowered her head bashfully.
Knowing the dark history of the two, Jiang Wan'er simply covered her mouth and snickered.
At that moment, Jiang Cheng felt as though he had drifted off into outer space.
Why was everyone around him such a master of facial expressions?
His face-switching brother-in-law.
His best actress of an older sister.
That infuriatingly cute pretender, Bai Moli.
Liu Bufan looked at the two of them, then exchanged a glance with Jiang Wan'er.
A mutual understanding seemed to pass between them.
Only then did Bai Moli notice Liu Bufan.
She couldn't help marveling to herself: Just who was this handsome young man? Especially compared to Jiang Cheng—who was currently wearing a tattered green dinosaur suit, stuffed his nostrils with two pieces of tissue paper, sported a pair of magnificent panda eyes, and had hair as messy as a bird's nest—the latter simply looked utterly unpresentable.
No woman could resist a bit of gossip. Seeing Jiang Wan'er looking so intimate with this handsome fellow, Bai Moli, who knew that Jiang Wan'er was already married, was already mentally scripting a thirty-episode domestic melodrama in her head.
Liu Bufan recognized the young woman as well, but judging by her expression, he could guess she was letting her imagination run wild. Having no intention of teasing her, he took the initiative to introduce himself: "Hello, I'm Liu Bufan. We've met before—I'm your Sister Wan'er's husband."
Bai Moli froze on the spot.
Liu Bufan?
This was Liu Bufan?
She had even told Sister Wan'er herself that, given Sister Wan'er's standards, she could have found any kind of man she wanted in Jiangzhou City; why on earth would she settle for a disfigured disabled person? She had assumed it was just a coincidence of sharing an idol's name, and that was how she had casually made her point.
It wasn't that she looked down on anyone, but Sister Wan'er clearly had much better options available.Because of this, Sister Wan'er and her family were even driven out by Grandpa Jiang. Oh right, Mom said we can't call him Grandpa Jiang anymore.
Yet, being an outsider, it wasn't my place to say too much.
Now, this handsome young man claims to be Liu Bufan. Eliminate all impossible factors, and whatever remains—no matter how implausible—must be the truth.
Therefore, this guy is definitely an impostor!
Furthermore, it's highly likely a setup orchestrated by that scumbag Jiang Cheng in collusion with Sister Wan'er to turn the tables!
I don't know what kind of setup it is yet, but clever as I am, how could I be fooled by mere mortals like you!
Watching Bai Moli's eyes darting around mischievously, then glancing at Jiang Cheng's current dazed expression, Liu Bufan felt like neither of these two had all their screws tightened.
Knowing full well the history between the two of them over the years, Jiang Wan'er gave Liu Bufan a look:
"Hubby, the young people have their own things to do. Didn't we come here to ride the roller coaster? Let's go play our own game and leave them to chat. Didn't Jiang Cheng say he came on a date with a young lady? It must be Moli. Let's not be third wheels."
Liu Bufan naturally tucked the remaining chicken wings into his jacket, handed one to his wife, and waved his hand:
"You guys chat amongst yourselves. Wan'er and I are going to stroll around."
With that, he vanished from the Chicken Killer Restaurant.
Jiang Cheng's brain was still in a daze:
He had come to the amusement park today to finish his annual verbal sparring match with Bai Moli. He originally planned to wear a dinosaur suit to scare her first and take the initiative, but accidentally discovered that his sister had found a younger man, so he tipped off his brother-in-law, only to end up getting a joint beating from the couple.
Just as he uncovered his brother-in-law's incredible secret in the restaurant, before he could even get to the bottom of it, his secret stash of money was exposed. Not only would he have no pocket money from now on, but his humiliating surrender had been captured on camera by Bai Moli, handing over kills for the next few years all at once...
Tomorrow—no, this afternoon, this afternoon I'm going to find a master by the roadside!
Crack—!
A crisp snap!
"Ouch, why do you guys keep hitting my head?"
"Scumbag, confess right now, who was that young man just now!""That's my brother-in-law...
Hey, hey, hey, don't start swinging yet.
That's my brother-in-law, but it seems something happened. My sister and brother-in-law haven't even told me yet, and you've already rushed over."
Bai Moli narrowed her eyes:
"No lying to me? This isn't some trap you, this dog, set up with Sister Wan'er to get me?"
"I swear, if I'm lying, I'll never receive another razor blade in the mail again!"
The corner of Bai Moli's mouth twitched—that was a vicious oath indeed.
Then she suddenly began to fidget shyly, as if sitting on a leaky electric blanket:
"Um, well, Sister Wan'er said you came here to go on a date with me, is that right?"
"Huh?
Oh, oh, oh, oh..."
Jiang Cheng shrugged:
"That was just to brush off my sister, wasn't it? You have no idea how complicated the situation was back then."
"Jiang Cheng!"
Bai Moli slammed her palm down and smashed the table to pieces!
"Holy crap!
What are you doing!
The time I was six and you put me in the hospital for a year—didn't we agree after that no more physical violence!
And when did you get so tough anyway!"
Jiang Cheng looked at the shattered table scattered all over the floor beyond any hope of rescue, shrinking in his seat in sheer terror, looking precisely like a little lamb about to be devoured.
The restaurant manager walked over, trembling:
"Hero, th-this table?"
"Naturally, put it on this green-haired dinosaur's tab! Hmph!"
With that, she turned and marched off.
"Mr. Green, what do you say?"
"My last name is Jiang!"
"Mr. Jiang Dinosaur, what do you say?"
"Master, master, master, where are you!"
Jiang Cheng paid out 200 yuan with a heart-wrenching wince—that was the price of ten catatties of razor blades!
"Bai Moli, you stay right there! Give me back the dinosaur head—it's rented! If I lose it, I'll have to pay for it!"
"Pay your big head!"
"No, I mean, big sis, how come you suddenly, so suddenly..."
He stared at her in absolute horror:
"Y-y-you don't actually want to go on a date with me, do you!"