In my life, Cáo Mèngdé, I've never bowed to anyone in my campaigns, yet I've been defeated by these sons kneeling before me.
In my life, Cáo Mèngdé, I conquered Lü Bu, held the Emperor captive, and swept across the north. I considered myself a truly formidable man, but if there's one thing that's given me the most headaches and kept me from letting go, it's not that long-eared rascal Yuán Shào, nor that mat-weaver Liú Bèi, but these sons of mine—some make me so proud I laugh in the middle of the night, some infuriate me to the point of slamming tables and cursing, and some fill me with such heartache that I secretly shed tears (???︿???)!
Today, we won't discuss military tactics or political schemes. I'll just chat with you all about the lives of these brats from the Cáo family. What a dramatic and turbulent life they had, more exciting than my Battle of Guandu!
I. Cáo Pī: The 'Movie King' Son, a 'Good Boy' on the Surface, but Full of 'Little Schemes' Inside.
This boy is my eldest legitimate son. From childhood, he was different from other kids—other brats either wielded swords and guns (like Cáo Zhāng) or buried themselves in books (like Cáo Zhí). But he would always roam around me with a copy of the 'Analects' and immediately stand up to bow when I entered, calling me 'Father, you've worked hard' and serving tea and water more diligently than any servant (??????)??.
At first, I pondered: 'Heh, this child is sensible. He can help me manage the household business in the future.'
Later, I realized this boy could act even more genuinely than a stage actor (?_?)!
When he was young, he followed me into battle. One time, that rascal Zhāng Xiù surrendered and then rebelled. In the chaos, I lost my horse. Cáo Áng, that boy, gave me his horse and perished himself.
Cáo Pī was only ten years old then. He actually managed to crawl out of the chaotic battle and report back to the camp. He didn't cry or wail, just said, 'Father, don't worry. Your son is fine, I just couldn't protect my elder brother.'
Back then, I felt this boy had a strong will and could handle things, but also a bit 'cold'—though he was sad about his brother's death, his main thought was 'how not to worry Father.' This thoughtfulness was a bit frightening (ー_ー゛).
As he grew older, things became more interesting. He knew I liked talented people, so he spent his days with strategists like Sima Yi and Chén Qún, not to learn academics, but to learn 'how to be a person.'
Once, I tested my two brothers on handling state affairs. Cáo Zhí immediately cited classics and gave grand speeches that sounded lively but were utterly useless; Cáo Pī, on the other hand, didn't say much. He recorded the disaster reports and grain counts submitted by local officials and itemized how 'grain should be transported, and the people should be pacified,' all practical matters.
I secretly laughed then: 'This boy knows how to do things much better than his brother (???)!'
But this boy could also be 'deviously cunning.'
One time, Cáo Zhí got drunk and rode his horse through the palace gate. I was so angry I wanted to punish him. Cáo Pī came and knelt before me, crying and pleading for Cáo Zhí, saying, 'My brother was momentarily foolish. Father, please don't be angry. It's not worth ruining your health.'
I was quite moved at first. But later I found out that Cáo Pī had deliberately sent wine to Cáo Zhí and incited him, saying, 'Father is in a good mood today. Go offer him a poem, and he'll surely be pleased.' As a result, Cáo Zhí got carried away and caused trouble.
You tell me, how deep are this boy's schemes (｀Д′)?
Later, after my death, he took over my position. Within two years, he deposed Emperor Xiàn of Han and became emperor himself, establishing the state of 'Wei.'
When I found out underground, I was both angry and amused—angry that he was so eager to usurp the throne, giving people ammunition; amused that he finally didn't waste my years of cultivation and was much better than that useless Emperor Xiàn of Han (≧?≦).
But after he became emperor, he started dealing with his own kin, demoting Cáo Zhí time and again and forcing him to write the 'Seven Steps Poem.' This was a dishonorable act!
I later dreamed and cursed him: 'Even if your brother was wrong, he's still your own brother. Must you force him like this?'
He, however, woke up and told his ministers, 'I dreamed of Father. Father praised me for governing effectively.' You tell me, this boy, even until death, never forgot to put on an act (?_?)!
But speaking of which, Cáo Pī's life wasn't easy.
He was the eldest son, with the prematurely deceased Cáo Áng above him, Cáo Zhí competing with him for the position of heir, and that reckless youth Cáo Zhāng watching covetously. If he hadn't been ruthless and cunning, he would have been completely devoured.
He reigned for seven years and didn't rest. He reformed the bureaucracy, built water conservancy projects, and even reconquered the Western Regions. He didn't disgrace our Cáo family (?ω?).
It's just that he lived too short a life. He died at only forty. It's estimated that he overworked himself during his reign as emperor and secretly took some longevity elixirs—this habit is like mine, wanting to live longer, but only having the opposite effect (╥﹏╥).
II. Cáo Zhí: The Genius 'Poet' but a 'Political Dud' 'Show-off' Son.
If you talk about talent in our Cáo family, it's definitely Cáo Zhí—he could write poetry at seven and discuss the 'Book of Odes' and 'Book of Documents' with me at ten, reciting them fluently, even better than those old scholars (?ω?)!
Once, I took him to the Bronze Sparrow Terrace and asked him to write a fu. He picked up his brush and after a moment's thought, produced, 'From tomorrow onwards, we shall revel and play; climbing the terraces to amuse our hearts.' This made the talented scholars like Chén Lín and Wáng Càn beside him slap their thighs in admiration: 'This boy is born to live by his brush and ink!'
I truly liked him at first. I felt this child had the 'spirit' of my youth, and I even thought about passing the throne to him.
But this boy, all his talent went into writing poetry. Politically, he was a 'simple-minded' fellow (｀へ′)!
Once, I ordered him to go to Fancheng to fight a battle. I assigned him the best soldiers. Before he departed, he was drinking with friends so drunk that he couldn't even mount his horse. I sent someone to urge him, and he actually argued with others: 'What's the rush! We must drink our fill before going to battle!'
I was so angry I almost smashed his wine pot—if this were on the battlefield, the enemy would have already chopped off his head and used it as a chamber pot (╯‵□′)╯︵┴─┴!
Even more absurdly, when he was competing with Cáo Pī for the heir position, he was surrounded by sycophants like Dīng Yí and Dīng Yì, who only knew how to talk. They told him, 'As long as you write good poems, Father will like you,' and he actually believed them!
On Cáo Pī's side, Sima Yi and Wú Zhì were helping him strategize on how to win over ministers and how to present himself to me. This one, however, spent his days drinking and writing poetry with a bunch of scholars, even writing 'Sacrifice oneself for national crisis, view death as returning home.' But when he was actually assigned a task, he couldn't even get out the door (ー_ー゛)!
The most disappointing thing was the 'Sima Gate Incident'—that was a gate only the emperor could pass through. But he, having gotten drunk, actually rode his horse through that gate and said to others, 'My father is the King of Wei, so what if I pass through this gate?'
At that time, I was discussing how to fight Liú Bèi with my ministers. When I heard this news, my hands trembled with anger—this boy was practically trampling the reputation of our Cáo family into the dirt (｀Д′)!
From then on, I knew this child couldn't uphold our Cáo family's empire. For his entire life, he was only suited for writing poetry in his study.
After Cáo Pī became emperor, he demoted Cáo Zhí to Anxiang, then later to Juancheng and Yongqiu, never allowing him to stay in the capital.
Once, Cáo Zhí came to the capital to pay respects. Cáo Pī deliberately refused to see him and ordered him to write a poem before leaving, or he wouldn't be allowed to go—this led to the later 'Seven Steps Poem.'
Watching from below, my heart ached terribly, but there was nothing I could do. Who could have predicted this child wouldn't be more ambitious (?_?)!
However, Cáo Zhí's life can be considered well-lived in its own way.
Later, he was demoted to Chen Commandery and stopped getting involved in politics. He wrote poems every day, like the 'Ode to the Luo River,' 'To the Prince of White Horses,' pouring all his grievances and longing into his poems.
He died at forty-one. When he died, he had only a few old servants and a box full of poetry manuscripts. Later, I had someone compile his manuscripts. Reading 'A life in this world, passes like the morning dew,' tears fell—this child, if he had been born into an ordinary family, might have become a poet whose works would be passed down for centuries. Unfortunately, he was born into our Cáo family, got entangled in the murky waters of power, and ended up this way (???︿???)!
III. Cáo Zhāng: The 'Muscle Man' but an 'Emotionally Stunted' 'Simpleton' Son.
This boy, Cáo Zhāng, was completely different from his two elder brothers—from childhood, he disliked reading and only loved wielding swords and guns. He was so strong he could lift a tiger (a bit exaggerated, but he was indeed strong) (｀Д′)!
Once, I asked him, 'What do you want to do when you grow up?' He blurted out, 'I want to be General of the Guards, lead troops into battle, and kill all the rebels in the world!'
I patted his shoulder and laughed: 'Good boy, you have your father's spirit!'
This boy was truly formidable in battle. In the twenty-third year of Jian'an, when the Wuhuan rebelled, he volunteered to quell the rebellion. I gave him five thousand cavalry. Before he left, he told me, 'Father, don't worry. If I can't win, I won't return to see you!'
When he arrived among the Wuhuan, he happened to encounter the enemy's main force. His subordinates were terrified, but he, holding his spear, charged forward, killing over a dozen enemies single-handedly. Seeing their general's ferocity, the soldiers followed suit and charged, eventually crushing the Wuhuan and capturing their leader Kēbǐnéng (?ω?)!
When he returned, he rode his horse, followed by a group of prisoners, his face covered in blood. He boasted to me, 'Father, see? I didn't lie!'
I was so proud then, thinking our Cáo family finally had someone who could fight (≧▽≦)!
But this boy was a 'one-track mind,' frighteningly low in emotional intelligence (?_?) .
Once, when I was gravely ill in Luoyang, I summoned him back to see me. On the way, he heard someone say, 'The King of Wei might pass the throne to you.' He was so happy that he told his subordinates, 'If I become King of Wei, I'll make you all generals!'
Once Cáo Pī heard this, how could he not hate him?
When he arrived in Luoyang, I was already on my deathbed. I held his hand and said, 'You must help your brother well, don't be reckless.' He foolishly asked, 'Father, can I be General of the Guards?'
I was so angry I almost passed out—this boy, at such a time, was still thinking of being General of the Guards (ー_ー゛)!
After my death, Cáo Pī became King of Wei. Cáo Zhāng foolishly went to the capital and asked Jiǎ Xǔ, 'Where is Father's seal?'
Jiǎ Xǔ quickly sent him away and told Cáo Pī, 'This boy cannot be kept. He must be dealt with quickly.'
Cáo Pī was also ruthless. He ostensibly enfeoffed Cáo Zhāng as Marquis of Yanling and sent him back to his fief, but secretly sent people to monitor him.
Once, Cáo Zhāng came to the capital to pay respects. Cáo Pī invited him to a meal. After eating, he suffered stomach pains and died a few days later—some say Cáo Pī poisoned him. I investigated for a long time underground but couldn't confirm it. But no matter what, if this boy had been more emotionally intelligent, he wouldn't have met such an end (╥﹏╥)!
Actually, Cáo Zhāng's life was quite pitiful.
He only wanted to be General of the Guards and lead troops into battle. He had no ill intentions, but he was too straightforward and couldn't navigate complex situations. In this arena of power, he was like a soldier without armor, easily penetrated.
He died at only thirty-five, an age when he could still fight. If he had lived longer, perhaps he could have helped Cáo Pī fight Zhūgě Liàng and Sūn Quán. Alas, this boy was too simple and died at the hands of his own kin (???︿???)!
IV. Cáo Áng: The 'Perfect Eldest Son' but a 'Tragic Sacrifice' 'Regrettable' Son.
This boy, Cáo Áng, was my eldest legitimate son and the son I wronged most in my life (?_?)!
He was ten years older than Cáo Pī. From childhood, he was sensible, intelligent, and filial. He was also skilled in battle, truly the epitome of a 'perfect son' (≧▽≦)!
Once, I discussed military strategy with him, and he actually pointed out flaws in my tactics, saying, 'Father, if the enemy attacks from the flank, our grain supply will be in danger.' At that moment, I felt this child would surely inherit my great enterprise in the future.
He followed me into battle at eighteen, brave and resourceful, never seeking credit.
Once, when fighting Lü Bu, he led a detachment to raid Lü Bu's supply lines, burning all his grain. Lü Bu had no choice but to retreat.
When I wanted to reward him, he said, 'This is the merit of the soldiers, not mine alone.' You see, how sensible this child was (??ω??)??!
But such a good son met his end at the hands of that rascal Zhāng Xiù.
In the second year of Jian'an, I attacked Zhāng Xiù, and he surrendered. In a moment of foolishness, I took Zhāng Xiù's aunt, Lady Zou, as my concubine. Zhāng Xiù felt insulted and rebelled.
That night, Zhāng Xiù's soldiers suddenly attacked my camp. I was sleeping soundly when I heard the sounds of killing and quickly got up. But my horse, 'Jueying,' had already been shot dead. Seeing that I was about to be overtaken by Zhāng Xiù's soldiers, Cáo Áng ran over, gave me his horse, and said, 'Father, you hurry and leave. I will hold them off!'
I was reluctant then, but he pushed me and said, 'If Father dies, our Cáo family is finished. It doesn't matter if I die!'
With that, he charged forward with his spear, fighting desperately against Zhāng Xiù's soldiers (???︿???)!
I rode away on horseback. When I looked back, Cáo Áng was already surrounded, covered in blood, but still fighting, until he was finally cut down by a multitude of blades.
At that moment, my heart felt as if it were being sliced by a knife. I couldn't even cry—I, Cáo Mèngdé, had killed many people in my life, but I had never felt such heartache. He was my eldest son, my most promising son (T_T)!
After I exterminated Zhāng Xiù, I placed his head before Cáo Áng's tomb. But I knew that even killing Zhāng Xiù wouldn't bring my Áng'er back.
Once, I argued with Lady Bian. Lady Bian said, 'Do you still remember Áng'er? If Áng'er were still alive, would Cáo Pī and Cáo Zhí be where they are today!'
I didn't speak then, but in my heart, I knew better than anyone that if Áng'er were alive, our Cáo family's empire would surely be more stable. But this is fate (／_＼)!
Cáo Áng's life was too short, only twenty years old when he died. He didn't have time to become crown prince, nor emperor, nor even to get married before becoming a sacrifice on my path to power.
Sometimes I wonder, if I hadn't taken Lady Zou that day, if I hadn't been so careless, would Áng'er still be alive?
But there are no regrets in this world. I can only say 'I'm sorry' to him from underground, hoping he won't be born into our Cáo family in his next life, but will be the son of an ordinary family and live a peaceful life (?????)!
V. Cáo Chōng: The 'Prodigy' Descended, but the 'Heaven Envied Talent' 'Little Angel' Son.
If you talk about who is most cherished in our Cáo family, it's definitely Cáo Chōng—he was the youngest son Lady Bian bore me, twelve years younger than Cáo Pī and six years younger than Cáo Zhí. From childhood, he was so intelligent it was unlike a child, our ancient version of a 'prodigy' (≧?≦)?!
You all know the story of 'Cao Chong Weighs the Elephant,' right?
Cáo Chōng was only six years old then. Sun Quan sent me an elephant. I wanted to know its weight, but no one knew how to weigh it. The ministers said, 'Why not kill the elephant, cut it into pieces, and weigh them?' I thought it was too much of a pity. Cáo Chōng ran over and said, 'Father, I have a way.'
He had someone drive the elephant onto a boat, mark the water level on the boat's side, then drive the elephant off. Next, he loaded stones onto the boat until the water level reached the mark. Then, he weighed the stones to determine the elephant's weight.
I held him then and laughed uncontrollably, saying, 'My son is truly a genius!'
The ministers also praised him, saying, 'King of Wei, you are fortunate to have such an intelligent son!' (?ω?)
This boy was not only intelligent but also extremely kind.
Once, the horse saddle in my storeroom was bitten by a mouse. The servant guarding the storeroom was terrified because at that time, it was believed that a mouse biting a horse saddle was an ill omen. The servant feared I would kill him and wanted to commit suicide.
Cáo Chōng found out and deliberately poked a few holes in his own clothes. Then he ran to me crying and said, 'Father, my clothes have been bitten by a mouse. People say biting clothes is an ill omen, and I'm so scared' (?＞?＜?).
I quickly comforted him, saying, 'This is all nonsense. It's nothing.'
Then the servant came to report that the horse saddle had been bitten by a mouse. I said, 'Even my son's clothes have been bitten by a mouse, let alone a horse saddle?'
So, I didn't pursue the servant's responsibility.
You tell me, this boy, at only six years old, was so compassionate. He would surely be a benevolent ruler in the future!
I liked Cáo Chōng very much at that time and even thought about passing the throne to him. Although he was young, I could train him.
Once, I told Sima Yi, 'This child Chōng'er will surely achieve great things in the future.' Sima Yi also said, 'A prodigy has descended. King of Wei, your succession is assured.'
But who knew that heaven envied talent? When Cáo Chōng was thirteen, he fell seriously ill and took to his bed. I summoned the best doctors in the world, but it was no use (?_?)!
That night, Cáo Chōng held my hand and said, 'Father, I'm so cold. I miss Mother.' I held him, tears streaming down my face, and said, 'Chōng'er, don't be afraid. Father is here. You will get better.'
But he still left, his eyes open, as if reluctant to part with me.
I almost fainted then, locking myself in my room for three days, refusing to see anyone—I had lost Áng'er, and now I had lost Chōng'er. What sins had I, Cáo Mèngdé, committed (T_T)!
Later, I buried Cáo Chōng in the outskirts of Xǔdū, building a large tomb for him. I also arranged a posthumous marriage for him, burying Lady Huan's daughter with him, hoping he wouldn't be lonely underground.
Once, I dreamed that Cáo Chōng ran over, took my hand, and said, 'Father, I am well here underground. Don't worry.' When I woke up, my pillow was wet (???︿???)!
Cáo Chōng's life was like a little angel. He stayed with our Cáo family for thirteen years, bringing me much joy, but left too soon. Sometimes I wonder, if Chōng'er had lived, would he have vied with Cáo Pī and Cáo Zhí for the succession? Would he have also died in the power struggle like Cáo Áng? Perhaps it's better this way. He left at his most beautiful age, untainted by the filth of power, forever the intelligent and kind little Chōng'er (?????)!
VI. Other Sons: Each Had Their Own 'Way of Life,' Each Had Their Own 'Helplessness.'
Besides Cáo Pī, Cáo Zhí, Cáo Zhāng, Cáo Áng, and Cáo Chōng, our Cáo family has over twenty other sons. Although not as famous, they each have their own stories and their own helplessness (ー_ー゛)!
For example, Cáo Jù. This boy was born to Lady Bian, making him Cáo Chōng's full brother. However, his personality was completely different from Cáo Chōng's—naturally timid, he didn't dare speak loudly in front of me, let alone get involved in court affairs. From childhood, he loved to tend to flowers and plants. His courtyard was filled with peonies and roses, and he kept a few parrots. Every day he would water the flowers or play with the birds, a veritable 'idle young master' (???)!
After Cáo Pī became emperor, he enfeoffed Cáo Jù as King of Pengcheng. He quickly went to his fief after receiving the title. Before leaving, he specifically kowtowed to Cáo Pī: 'Your younger brother only wishes to live by guarding his fief and dares not inquire about state affairs.'
Later, Cáo Pī tried to summon him to the capital several times, but he always found excuses like 'disaster has not yet subsided in my fief' or 'I am unwell,' adamantly refusing to step foot into the capital.
This boy never fought for anything in his life, nor did he offend anyone. He lived over sixty years peacefully and steadily, one of the longest-living sons of our Cáo family. Sometimes I look at him and think he's smarter than Cáo Pī and Cáo Zhí—in this arena of power, 'not being greedy' is the best form of protection (≧▽≦)!
There's also Cáo Yǔ, born to Lady Huan. His disposition was gentle, and he lacked strong opinions, yet he was close to Cáo Chōng. When Cáo Chōng died, he was only eight years old. He cried so hard, holding Cáo Chōng's coffin, that he fainted. For several years afterward, he barely spoke (?_?) .
As he grew up, he didn't have many ambitions, only wanting to live by guarding his fief.
But he couldn't help being drawn in—after Cáo Pī's death, Cáo Guì became emperor and, thinking Cáo Yǔ was honest, wanted him to be General of the Guards and assist in governing.
Cáo Yǔ was terrified and quickly declined: 'Your subject does not possess such ability and fears he would mismanage state affairs.'
Within days, Cáo Shuǎng and Sima Yi seized the position of regent.
Later, Sima Yi launched the 'Prohibition of Gaoping Tombs,' killing Cáo Shuǎng. Cáo Yǔ was so frightened that he quickly relinquished his military authority and stayed shut in his home every day. I watched from underground, both angry and heartbroken—this boy was too cowardly, but there was nothing to be done. In front of that old fox Sima Yi, being cowardly might even save his life (／_＼)!
There was also Cáo Lín, born to Lady Du. His temper was as stubborn as a bull, and he didn't get along with Cáo Pī.
After Cáo Pī became emperor, he deliberately demoted him to Qiaojun, a remote commandery, and also reduced his stipend.
Cáo Lín didn't cause a fuss. He cleared a piece of wasteland in Qiaojun, farmed it himself, and raised chickens, living like an ordinary farmer (???)!
Once, Cáo Pī sent someone to investigate him. The report came back: 'The prince carries a hoe to the fields every day and eats coarse grains.' Upon hearing this, Cáo Pī didn't trouble him further—perhaps he felt this brother posed no threat, or perhaps he remembered some brotherly affection.
Cáo Lín remained in Qiaojun for his entire life. Before he died, he told his son: 'The wealth of our Cáo family was gained at the tip of a sword. It's better to live securely on a few acres of land.'
Conclusion: For the children of royalty, how can life ever be 'easy'?
These sons of our Cáo family—some fought for power and profit, some were content with their lot, some were immensely talented, and some were mediocre. But no matter which one, in their lives, none escaped the shackles of the name 'Cáo Family'—born into a royal family, seemingly glorious, but in reality, every step was treacherous (???︿???)!
Cáo Pī became emperor but lived a life of suspicion and died young; Cáo Zhí became a great poet but lived a life of wandering; Cáo Zhāng was a capable warrior but died mysteriously; Cáo Áng and Cáo Chōng even lost their lives early. Sometimes I lie underground, watching our Cáo family's empire later usurped by Sima Yi, watching those child emperors like Cáo Fāng and Cáo Māo being manipulated, and my heart is filled with mixed emotions (ー_ー゛)!
I fought battles all my life, wanting to build an empire for my descendants, but in the end, I made them all sacrifices to power. If I had known earlier, I might as well not have become King of Wei in the first place, but remained an ordinary vassal, letting my children live peaceful lives—but where in this world is there an 'if only' (／_＼)!
Ultimately, the fate of these sons of our Cáo family is just that—fate. Their squabbles, their struggles, all became a few lines in the history books in the end. Only I, their father, still remember their childhood appearances underground—remembering Cáo Pī's cautiousness when serving tea, Cáo Zhí's spirited demeanor when writing poetry, Cáo Zhāng's imposing presence when wielding his spear, Cáo Áng's determination when protecting me, and Cáo Chōng's smile when he said, 'Father, I have a way' (?????)!
In this life, I am King of Wei, Cáo Mèngdé. I have won countless battles and made many mistakes. But what I cared about most was never the empire or the state, but these sons of the Cáo family whom I loved and hated, cherished and got angry at!
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