Chapter 14

It wasn't that Shu Dong was heavy, but rather that Boss Song was far too weak right now. "You should lie down quickly." Shu Dong steadied herself and hastily went to support him, terrified that something else might go wrong. "Not lying down, I want to sit." Boss Arrogant Song had logged on. Shu Dong wore a blank expression: "The doctor said you need rest." Song Feng refused to lie down: "I can rest sitting up." Unable to argue with him, Shu Dong simply let him sit. But after sitting for a moment, Boss Song started acting up again. "I want to go back." Shu Dong raised her head and shot him a cold look: "No." "I can lie down at home too." Song Feng didn't like hospitals. He had no choice when accompanying Grandpa and Grandma Meng in the past, but right now, he didn't want to stay another second. Besides, this injury wasn't all that serious; he'd had worse before, yet he'd gone straight to school the next day. It was just that he had suddenly grown addicted to the feeling of someone worrying about him. "No, you have to stay in the hospital." Remembering how much blood he had lost this afternoon, Shu Dong spoke in a soft voice, but she refused to yield an inch. Song Feng made a show of getting up from the bed, but the moment his feet touched the floor, his body wobbled slightly, and he looked as though he was about to crash right into... Shu Dong hurriedly caught him in her arms. Sitting on the edge of the bed, Song Feng wrapped his arms around Shu Dong as well. Seconds ticked away, yet Song Feng held her tighter and tighter. Shu Dong stood while Song Feng sat. Due to the difference in posture and height, Song Feng buried his head against Shu Dong's chest, listening to the rhythm of her heartbeat: "Where is home?" Shu Dong stood cautiously, not daring to move, but the moment she heard the word "home," her eyes instantly darkened. "I don't know." "When did you come to Hecheng?" There was a faint fragrance about her, yet Song Feng's eyes were pitch black. "When I was four." Shu Dong's chin happened to rest right on his shoulder. The hospital room was dead silent, time seemingly frozen. Only her steady heartbeat echoed, beat by beat, in Song Feng's ear. "Can I hug you?" Song Feng smiled. "No." Shu Dong refused out of sheer reflex, only realizing after the word left her lips that the two of them were already holding each other. Song Feng smiled triumphantly. "Then can I kiss you?" There was a trace of tenderness mixed into Song Feng's roguish smile. "No." Shu Dong refused with a blank expression. Song Feng straightened his posture, placed a hand at the back of Shu Dong's head to draw her close, and kissed her... To her surprise, Shu Dong neither struggled nor refused. Outside the window, the river of stars was brilliant, clear without a single patch of dark clouds. The pure, serene moonlight spilled quietly into the room, and two heavy hearts licked their wounds. A long time passed before Song Feng finally released Shu Dong. Looking into her evasive eyes, he smiled: "Can I go to your place to crash for the night?" Shu Dong: "No."

Shu Dong was cooking. She glanced sideways at the person lounging on the sofa, wondering how on earth she had let him in. "I'll help you wash the vegetables." Whatever was playing on the television, Song Feng couldn't focus on it, and it was getting a bit noisy anyway, so he simply turned the TV off. "No need, just sit down and get some proper rest." Shu Dong pulled two heads of green vegetables from the refrigerator. "I bumped my head, I'm not paralyzed in the legs." Song Feng walked over to Shu Dong's side and began peeling the leaves off one by one, looking very considerate. Shu Dong paused mid-peel. What he said seemed to make sense... From the moment she saw him collapse on the ground this afternoon until now, her sympathy seemed to have overflowed. "Then you wash them, and stir-fry them while you're at it." Shu Dong sat on the sofa and turned the television back on. "..." Song Feng froze. Was this how one treated a patient? Boss Song had merely wanted to display a bit of gentlemanly charm to keep her from doing it alone, but that didn't mean he wanted to do all the work either—what he wanted was for the two of them to do it together. "Can't you show some pity for a patient?" Song Feng still had a leafy vegetable in his hand. Staring at the screen, Shu Dong didn't even turn her head: "You only hurt your head." "..." Wearing a black baseball cap, Song Feng's expression was obscured, but it was clear his face had instantly lengthened into a sour frown. The television was broadcasting a costume drama. Shu Dong had watched a couple of episodes before, but right now she couldn't get into it at all... Her relationship with Song Feng had turned into something very strange. They weren't lovers, nor did they seem quite like friends. Compared to Yu Zhiyi, Shu Dong instinctively felt that Song Feng was far more dangerous. He was a man who played by his own rules; he would treat you well one moment if he felt like it, and crush you into pieces the next if the mood struck. His care and consideration had nothing to do with romance. Therefore, Shu Dong couldn't tell when he was actually being genuine toward her. Dealing with him required immense caution, and she had to guard her heart fiercely. Song Feng was undeniably handsome, and having a man like this lingering around you day in and day out treating you well made it far too easy to fall for him. For him, capturing a girl's heart was a simple task. Yet Shu Dong was terrified that if she ever let down her guard and truly grew to like him, he would cruelly push her away the very next second—because they had started out using each other from the very beginning, and Song Feng had explicitly stated that he didn't like her. She could not simply leap into another briar patch the moment she managed to crawl out of the last one. The light in Shu Dong's eyes gradually faded, and right along with it, she tightly shut the door to her heart. She touched the tattoo around her waist. In the past, she had only harbored a single lingering obsession, but gradually a few presumptuous thoughts had crept in. From now on, she would never harbor extravagant hopes again; she would hold fast to that single obsession and nothing more. The sound of chopping echoed from behind, followed by the whir of the range hood turning on. The greens didn't need to be stir-fried for long. Song Feng carried the plate over to the coffee table and noticed she was spacing out. "What are you thinking about?" Song Feng sat on the sofa, pulling his cap down slightly. Even though he was injured, Boss Song stubbornly kept his cap on indoors, pulling it down even lower to boot, because the bruises, swelling, and gauze on his face... were truly unsightly. "I was wondering... why life is so bitter." A lighter and a pack of cigarettes sat on the coffee table. Shu Dong lit one up. Song Feng's movements paused. Out of the corner of his eye, he glanced at her—this wasn't something a nineteen-year-old girl should be saying. At nineteen, she ought to be in college, wandering carefree around shopping malls with friends, without a care for the hardships of life, cherished in the palms of her parents' hands like a little princess... Watching her blow out rings of smoke, the hazy wisp carrying an air of numb despair, Song Feng didn't hesitate. Just like every time before, he snatched the cigarette from her fingers and stubbed it out. "How about a piece of candy instead?" Acting like a magician, Song Feng produced a lollipop from his pocket, unwrapped it, and placed it right in front of Shu Dong. Song Feng was trying to quit smoking. Just as Shu Dong had put it, he only reached for them when he had time to kill and didn't know what to do with his hands, which was why he always carried candy on him. The pink candy looked sweet enough. Just like the last time he came looking for her at the tattoo parlor, it was strawberry-flavored. Shu Dong smiled... See? He was starting up again. "But I want to smoke." Shu Dong reached for the lighter again. "Not allowed." Song Feng caught her hand and pressed the candy against her lips. Shu Dong didn't open her mouth. She looked calmly at Song Feng: "What right do you have to police me?" His brow furrowed in an imperceptible frown. Song Feng was momentarily stunned by the question, but an instant later he lapsed back into his roguish demeanor: "I police you because I want to, no reason why. In short, smoking is forbidden." Porridge was simmering on the stove, sending up tendrils of white steam. The fresh fragrance of rice gradually permeated the entire living room. The two of them sat very close on the sofa, the television still running, its noise adding a lively, bustling warmth... It was brimming with the cozy atmosphere of everyday life. This was something Shu Dong had always yearned for yet could never attain, but she refused to lose herself in it. "The porridge is ready." Shu Dong accepted his candy, gave it a lick, and found it very sweet. Eating a piece of candy didn't mean anything. Let him indulge his whims if he pleased; she could play along too. Song Feng didn't know what he was being so stubborn about, but seeing her obediently eat the candy satisfied him. With a smile, he patted Shu Dong's head: "I'll go dish out the food." With the lollipop tucked against her cheek, Shu Dong brushed lightly at the spot where Song Feng had stroked her head, trying to wipe away the phantom print of his hand. Rock sugar had been added to the white porridge, leaving a faint, sweet aftertaste. Shu Dong liked cooking it this way, and the first time Song Feng tried it, he thought it wasn't bad either. It was already past nine o'clock. Neither of them had eaten a thing since noon. Shu Dong had been starving at the hospital, but she hadn't dared leave the room—thinking about it now, it seemed a bit foolish... He wasn't going to up and die just lying there. "Is that enough to fill you up?" Song Feng didn't have much of an appetite and only finished a small bowl. "Mhm, I'm done." Shu Dong had a tiny appetite as well. "All done? Go wash the dishes then." Song Feng was back to bullying her. Shu Dong froze for a second. She gathered the bowls and chopsticks from the coffee table and walked a few steps over to the open-plan kitchen. Even if Song Feng hadn't said anything, she would have washed them anyway, but receiving a direct command from him left her deeply reluctant. Shu Dong was a woman of few words normally, so Boss Song, with his scrambled brains today, completely failed to notice anything unusual about her. Once everything was tidied up, Shu Dong sat back down on the sofa: "When are you leaving?" Song Feng was watching television. He lifted his gaze: "Not leaving. I'm staying." Shu Dong: "No." Song Feng: "I'll get yelled at if I go home." Boss Song began playing the sympathy card. In truth, he wasn't afraid of getting yelled at; he was just worried about distressing his grandparents. Shu Dong paused while wiping the coffee table, her heart softening for a single second. "Who told you to get into a fight?" Shu Dong's voice possessed a sort of magic; the words coming from her mouth always carried the exact same pitch. Whether refusal, inquiry, or reprimand, her tone remained flat and devoid of fluctuation. "You." The single word was short and light, yet it dropped straight into Shu Dong's heart, stirring up ripples that stacked outward, wave upon wave, the aftershocks refusing to settle. Shu Dong's gaze dropped to a patch of the coffee table, staring blankly at it, lost in thought. A moment later, acting as if nothing had happened at all, she resumed wiping the surface. Shu Dong's method for dealing with Song Feng's roguish behavior was simple: she gave no response whatsoever. Yet this time, Song Feng wasn't lying; hearing those words from Yu Zhiyi really had driven him past the point of restraint. "Come sit over here." Song Feng made space beside him, wanting to chat with her. "I haven't finished wiping it yet." Shu Dong always had an excuse to put him off. "You've already wiped it several times over." The TV was on, but Song Feng's attention wasn't on the screen. "..." Shu Dong put the rag away. "You keep interrupting me." "Did I interrupt you?" Song Feng looked at her with mischievous amusement. The little thing was actually learning how to frame people. "Mhm." Shu Dong-style indifference. Ceasing his teasing, Song Feng reached out as she passed by the sofa and yanked her down right beside him. The distance between them closed instantly, and his upper body leaned further forward: "Why are you avoiding me?" Boss Song, whose brain was on the fritz, had finally figured it out. Struggling to get up, Shu Dong found she couldn't break free, so she simply stopped moving and looked calmly at Song Feng: "Because you keep putting your hands on me." Song Feng was momentarily taken aback. So she viewed him as the Big Bad Wolf? "I..." He wanted to defend himself, but the moment he opened his mouth, he realized he lacked the conviction. Reviewing his behavior ever since they met, he supposed he really did act quite a bit like the Big Bad Wolf. Song Feng found himself defenseless against the accusation, though he genuinely hadn't been like this before—he had no idea why he felt compelled to pick on Shu Dong the moment he laid eyes on her, even letting her accidentally steal his first kiss in the process. Amid her struggling, Shu Dong's T-shirt rode up slightly, exposing a slender, fair strip of her waist, where the black tattoo stood out in sharp contrast. Song Feng's peripheral vision was snagged by the little train tattooed on her waist. He lowered his gaze, and his hand instinctively moved to rest upon it, gently stroking the skin. The very instant his fingertips brushed against her, cool and a bit ticklish, Shu Dong gave a start, her lower abdomen tightening as she spoke in an icy voice: "Let go of me." Song Feng's hand froze. He raised his head to look at Shu Dong, not bothering to offer an explanation anymore, because he desperately wanted to know why his hooligan instincts had kicked in so naturally. Releasing her, Song Feng consciously scooted a bit further down the other end of the sofa to prove he wasn't entirely a rogue, leaving a clear gap between them. "Why did you get that tattooed?" The coffee table was spotless. Song Feng swept a glance over the cigarette pack and lighter resting on the surface, licked his lips, and pulled another piece of candy from his pocket. "What happened between you and Yu Zhiyi?" Flipping the candy wrapper back and forth, Song Feng raised his eyes for a quick glance at Shu Dong, then allowed the corners of his mouth to twitch in an imperceptible smirk... She was even learning how to negotiate conditions now. Trying to recall the events of three years ago, Song Feng bit down on the lollipop and spoke in an even, unhurried tone: "The afternoon of the second day of the college entrance exams, he told me he saw my grandfather hauled away in an ambulance. When I rushed back, my grandparents were playing chess." His tone was calm and devoid of fluctuation, as though he were recounting someone else's story. Looking at him, Shu Dong suddenly made a connection: "You didn't take the exam?" "No." Shu Dong's hands slowly clenched. Song Feng had always excelled academically, though he possessed the requisite rebelliousness and mischief of that age. In his second year of high school, during a major joint examination, he had placed first in the city, but immediately after the exams wrapped up, he got into a fight, and the teacher threatened to call his parents. At the time, Yu Zhiyi was the study commissioner. He made a phone call to Song Feng's home, and coincidentally, Grandpa Meng was having a coughing fit; the panic sent him straight to the hospital. While Yu Zhiyi always appeared unassuming and uncompetitive, he harbored a deep jealousy toward Song Feng and loved to secretly compare himself to him. Having finally found dirt on him over the fight, Yu Zhiyi called Song Feng's family—never expecting that it would agitate Grandpa Meng to the point of hospitalization. Song Feng didn't blame Yu Zhiyi; regardless of whether Yu Zhiyi had selfish motives, Song Feng loathed himself above all. Grandpa Meng had fallen severely ill that time, leaving Song Feng lost in a fog for a long time. Was being a good student really a good thing? For many, yes, but for Song Feng, it was a painful burden and an impossible choice. Clearly possessing the ability to fly, he had been forced to snap his own wings with his bare hands. In the month that followed, he stopped feeling lost, and his grades stopped being so stellar. He descended step by step from the heavens into the mud, engaging in a clear-headed, deliberate fall. The person who understood you best might not be your family, but your rival. Yu Zhiyi knew Song Feng was holding back. Right before stepping into the exam hall for the final test of the college entrance exams, Yu Zhiyi told Song Feng that he had seen an ambulance parked downstairs at his apartment building. Song Feng stood staring at the entrance of the exam hall mere paces away for a very long time before finally turning around and heading to the hospital. Though he had spent his entire senior year slacking off and trying to rot away in the mud without a struggle, the moment he actually sat down inside the exam hall, his reluctance flared up. Yet the moment Yu Zhiyi delivered that message, the very last thread of his resistance snapped. His scores on the first three tests had been near-perfect, but he scored a zero on the final comprehensive science exam. "Why didn't you retake the year?" Shu Dong asked softly. "No difference." So what if he retook it? Should he score brilliantly and go off to college, leaving the two elderly people behind at home alone? Song Feng couldn't do it. His grandparents had endured immense hardship. They had lost their son at a young age, experiencing the agony of a parent burying a child, and his mother had remarried. If Song Feng left too, this family would truly shatter. Perhaps he could finish university and then return to Hecheng? By then, the resentment and regret would still be there, so he might as well sever that thought from the very start. The world was vast, and a person's life seemingly offered countless paths, yet the one belonging to you had long since been paved. You could stand at the crossroads hesitating, filled with regret and reluctance... but in the end, you would still walk down that very path. That was the only road available to you. Whenever you told yourself you would wait and go places later, waiting proved useless; it was already destined that you would never reach those destinations in this lifetime. The older one grew, the harder it was to believe that man could conquer fate. In a person's lifetime, the choices available were far too few. And Song Feng's path was to stay in Hecheng. Over the years, whether concerning obsessions or unfulfilled dreams, Song Feng viewed things with increasing detachment. He knew what mattered most to him, and he felt he was doing fine right now; he didn't regret his initial choice. Although regret and reluctance would forever linger, if given the chance to do it all over again, he would still make the exact same choice. As for Yu Zhiyi... That afternoon during the college entrance exams, Song Feng had gone straight to the hospital upon leaving the test site. He knew which department his grandfather belonged to, which floor he was on, and was even on familiar terms with the nurses. Yet after asking at the nurse's station, the nurse told him his grandfather wasn't there. Song Feng's mind had gone completely blank at the time, his blood feeling as though it had frozen solid. He wanted nothing more than to sprint back to the exam hall and tear Yu Zhiyi to pieces! Yet he didn't. Walking like a corpse, Song Feng wandered the streets, sitting in a daze on a bench by the roadside until the exams ended, before finally returning home to find his grandparents playing chess. To this day, his grandparents had no idea what had happened that afternoon, and Song Feng would never let them find out. Song Feng had spent over ten days sleeping the days away at home in a daze, refusing to step outside no matter who came looking. It wasn't until the day the scores were released and he saw his marks that Song Feng—who had previously feared nothing and cared about nothing—felt his eyes burn red. He beat Yu Zhiyi half to death. With that fight, Song Feng's anger dissipated. From then on, he would simply live out the life he had chosen for himself. However, Yu Zhiyi kept lingering in front of him, and Song Feng would have felt he was doing him a disservice if he didn't throw a punch. "You're very happy, having someone you need to protect." Shu Dong felt a tight ache in her chest, as if it had been stuffed with a vinegar-soaked cotton ball. Even though Song Feng recounted it so lightly, that was a person's entire life... So what kind of a fiend had she actually liked before? Song Feng smiled faintly. It seemed this was the first time anyone had ever used the word "happy" in relation to him. But compared to her... Song Feng's gaze grew dim, his peripheral vision catching the outline of the pattern faintly visible at her waist. "So, what about the little train?" The corners of Shu Dong's lips twitched upward as she stood up from the sofa: "I'm not telling you." Little Wood was actually learning how to tease people. Song Feng grabbed her wrist in a flash: "You're bullying me." "Mhm." With the faint trace of a smile playing at the corners of her lips, Shu Dong made to head toward her bedroom. "Get back here!" Song Feng rose from the sofa, striding over to block her path at the bedroom doorway. "I need to take a shower." "The bathroom is that way." Shu Dong pointed toward the entryway. "I'm injured." "Mhm." "It's inconvenient." "Mhm." "You'll have to help me wash."

Shu Dong sized Song Feng up from top to bottom. Most of his face was hidden beneath his cap, the brim pulled down extremely low. Although she couldn't see anything, the mischief evident in his smile gave him away entirely. There was a small, scorched hole right on the chest of his T-shirt—it looked like she had accidentally burned it with the iron earlier... "Chen Hui would probably be more than happy to help you wash." Shu Dong pulled out her phone, searching for Chen Hui's contact information. Snatching the phone straight from her hand, Song Feng tossed it onto the sofa and flicked Shu Dong on the forehead: "Naughty." Shu Dong shot him a cold, sidelong glance and retreated into her bedroom. She had previously bought a set of pajamas for Zhengyu, but they had turned out too big and he hadn't wanted them. Digging them out from the closet, Shu Dong left them outside the bathroom door. But the moment she turned to leave, the bathroom door swung open. "What do you think you're doing?" Shu Dong hastily covered her eyes. "I saw you lingering outside the door and thought you were coming in." The bathroom featured a frosted glass door, and Song Feng chuckled at the sight of her flustered attempt to shield her eyes. He lowered his head to inspect himself... He was merely bare-chested; he still had his trousers on. "I'm not coming in, those are the pajamas." Shu Dong kept her eyes covered as she walked away. "Watch where you're walking, don't trip." Song Feng chuckled until his injuries twitched with pain. Little Wood was truly adorable.