He irresponsibly uttered that word of love, making Shu Dong's stagnant life stir with emotion. But the moment Yu Zhiyi discovered that the real Shu Dong was different from what he had imagined, he discarded her without a second thought.
Falling for her was just a fleeting novelty, much like the tattoo on his back—he wanted to try something different, yet he didn't dare let it see the light of day.
Yu Zhiyi sat on the sofa, spacing out for a moment, when he suddenly recalled Song Feng mentioning during their last meal that his internet cafe was around here...
Blinding sunlight streamed through the window, making even the dust motes floating in the air clearly visible.
Yu Zhiyi smiled, a hint of ruthlessness flashing across his gentle, refined face.
Just as he wished, Song Feng had rotted in the mud, rotted in this gasping, dilapidated city.
Around four or five in the afternoon, the sun was still scorching. Yu Zhiyi stepped out of the tattoo shop and looked around, instantly spotting the neon sign on the third floor across the street. Even though the lights were off, it was easy to find.
Fengsu Internet Cafe.
He hadn't been to an internet cafe more than a handful of times in his life. Yu Zhiyi walked slowly up the stairs, and before he even stepped through the doorway, he heard the noisy commotion inside. What kind of expression would Song Feng have if he saw him?
Thinking of this, Yu Zhiyi pushed the door open with a smile. The first thing that met his eyes was a group of young kids wearing headphones, their gazes deeply focused.
Chen Hui heard the door open, but couldn't be bothered to look up. Only after a moment, when the person still hadn't come over to scan their face, did Chen Hui glance toward the door. But the moment he turned his head, he froze...
Yu Zhiyi?!
"What are you doing here?" Caught off guard by the shock and suddenness, the award-winning actor Chen Hui let his usual acting skills drop to the floor and shatter into tiny pieces.
Yu Zhiyi walked up to the counter with a smile. "I came to see Dongdong, and thought I'd drop by to see you guys. Is Song Feng not around?"
After a few seconds of buffering, Chen Hui picked up the shattered pieces of his acting skills from the floor and gave a light cough. "Boss Song is busy all day long, now you see him, now you don't..."
Before Chen Hui could finish, Song Feng pushed the door open and walked in.
The door was directly facing the counter. Song Feng was carrying a few boxes of medicine in a transparent plastic bag. When he opened the door and saw Yu Zhiyi, he was also momentarily stunned.
"Well, look at your timing today." Chen Hui didn't blush or skip a beat as he bantered with Yu Zhiyi, deleting the text message he had half-typed.
Song Feng only paused for a second before walking straight to the counter without stopping. He didn't say a word as he passed Yu Zhiyi, casually tossing the medicine onto the table.
Yu Zhiyi, on the other hand, looked around the room carefully and said with a smile, "This place of yours isn't too big, but it's quite nice. It's just a bit out of the way, might be hard to find in these alleys."
Having rushed around in the sweltering heat all afternoon, Song Feng slumped into his chair the moment he stepped inside. "It's quiet, and the rent is cheap."
Yu Zhiyi was slightly taken aback. Imagining it was one thing, but seeing it with his own eyes was entirely different. A person who used to be so proud and flamboyant was now surrounded by the trivial, mundane chores of making a living. Anyone who saw this would sigh with emotion.
"What, came to play games?" Song Feng got up, retrieved a can of cola from the fridge behind him, and tossed it to Yu Zhiyi. Since someone had shown up on his doorstep, regardless of their motives, he still had to play the gracious host.
However, how could Yu Zhiyi waste his time on such meaningless things? So, Boss Song's subtext was actually—hurry up and disappear.
"Came to see Dongdong." Yu Zhiyi caught the cola with a smile. "Remembered you were around here, so I thought I'd drop by."
Seeing Yu Zhiyi glance out the window toward the direction of the tattoo shop, Song Feng finally realized he was talking about Shu Dong.
He glanced sideways out the window downstairs, feeling that all affectionate terms were completely unsuited for her, especially when spoken by Yu Zhiyi.
She should simply be called Shu Dong.
"What do you even see in her?" Song Feng asked casually, though his listless eyes closely watched Yu Zhiyi's every subtle expression.
"Matters of the heart are never that easy to explain." Yu Zhiyi maintained his customary faint, composed smile.
But Song Feng had no intention of letting it go at that. "Getting tired of the obedient schoolgirls and want to try a different flavor, is that it?"
Yu Zhiyi chuckled. "Since when did you start caring so much about my affairs?"
"Always."
Song Feng the corners of his mouth twitched, answering without a moment's hesitation.
Yu Zhiyi was stunned. He knew Song Feng was very smart; his lazy, listless demeanor day in and day out was simply because there were very few things he actually cared about. And similarly falling outside of Song Feng's attention span was none other than Yu Zhiyi himself.
Song Feng had never once taken him seriously.
Chen Hui stood nearby watching over his precious gaming console, but his ears were tuned to the commotion next door, ready to jump into action at any moment.
"Aren't you interning? Why are you back?" Song Feng got up from his chair.
"Got some business at school, took a day off." Yu Zhiyi leaned against the first row of tables.
You ask, I answer; the atmosphere was quite harmonious, and no one would ever guess these two used to fight to the bitter end.
"The TV station seems pretty far from your school."
"Yeah, planning to move out and rent a place."
Song Feng leaned against the windowsill, the intense summer sun blazing from behind, casting his entire face in shadow.
He slowly pulled a meaningful smile.
If he remembered correctly, she was borrowing money yesterday?
Song Feng did everything with a languid air, even fighting with that lazy detachment. Thus, he was also skilled at casually weaving a trap and watching his prey walk right into it.
For some inexplicable reason, Yu Zhiyi didn't want to continue this topic. His gaze lingered on the medicine on the table for a few seconds. "Is Grandpa Meng doing well?"
Chen Hui was startled inwardly and snapped his head up, looking at Yu Zhiyi, then hastily checking Boss Song's reaction.
Song Feng's entire face was turned away from the light, making his expression unreadable.
There was a brief silence, but then Chen Hui suddenly heard a soft chuckle coming from the window.
"Very well."
Yu Zhiyi smiled and nodded. "I'll go visit Grandpa Meng when I have time. It's been so long since..."
Before he could finish his sentence, Song Feng lunged forward, his fist already crashing toward him.
Yu Zhiyi hadn't expected Song Feng to strike suddenly, or perhaps he had been wondering just how long Song Feng could hold back before making a move.
Yu Zhiyi slammed back against the table, the loud crash instantly silencing the entire internet cafe. A few people sensing the situation wasn't right immediately pulled off their headphones and stood up, looking eager for a fight.
"Sit back down," Chen Hui said, putting down his handheld console.
For this kind of thing, Boss Song alone was more than enough.
Song Feng grabbed Yu Zhiyi by the collar and smiled. "Are you satisfied with what you saw today?"
Yu Zhiyi grabbed Song Feng's wrist, forcefully prying his hand off his clothes, and then drove a punch straight into Song Feng's shoulder blade.
"Very satisfied." Yu Zhiyi brushed the wrinkles off his clothes, his smile even brighter than before. "Song Feng, this is what suits you best—rotting in the mud together with these low-life scum at the bottom of the food chain."
Song Feng smiled. "So prescient, are you? Then let's guess, will you be walking out of here on your feet today, or horizontal?"
With that, Song Feng smashed a glass bottle right over Yu Zhiyi's head.
Watching from the side, Chen Hui felt this scene almost perfectly mirrored the one from three years ago—the exact same movement, the exact same people.
Back then, Chen Hui had fought desperately to hold them back, but today, he didn't plan to intervene. Because if he hadn't stepped in three years ago, Yu Zhiyi would have died, and now...
Many things had already changed.
Warm liquid trickled down from Yu Zhiyi's scalp, and he raised a hand to touch it—it was blood. Looking at the bright red on his hand, he suddenly laughed.
Being forced by Song Feng to reveal his true self actually felt somewhat long-overdue and liberating.
Seeing him like a cornered beast on the verge of death felt even more liberating.
Yu Zhiyi didn't want Song Feng to have an easy time. He had a deeply competitive streak, but he had never shown it in front of people, always maintaining that harmless, innocent persona. Yet at this very moment, he had ripped off that mask himself.
"Song Feng, you don't need to struggle. We stopped being people of the same world a long time ago." Swaying slightly on his feet, Yu Zhiyi leaned against the wall and kept smiling. "I'm going further and further, while you can only live out your days in this broken alley."
The pain slowly began to set in. After saying his piece, Yu Zhiyi left, his stride somewhat unsteady. Song Feng didn't stop him either; with that bottle smashed down, whatever had been pent up in his chest seemed to have scattered along with it.
All the younger guys in the internet cafe secretly observed Song Feng's reaction, and so did Chen Hui. But Song Feng acted as if nothing had happened, picked up the bag of medicine from the table, and walked out.
Riding his bicycle, even the wind blowing in his face was hot. After working hard all day, those few minutes of rest earlier didn't seem quite enough. Twenty minutes later, Song Feng parked his bike downstairs at the apartment complex.
Pushing the door open, Grandpa Meng was asleep in his chair with a book spread across his lap. He hadn't even turned on the air conditioning in this scorching heat. Song Feng picked up the remote control from the sofa and switched the AC on.
The subtle movement still woke Grandpa Meng up.
"Xiaofeng is back." With a sleepy haze still clouding his eyes, Grandpa Meng shifted, and the book slid from his lap onto the floor.
As he was about to bend down to pick it up, Song Feng retrieved the book and placed it on the nearby coffee table. "Did you cough a lot today?"
"Didn't cough much, much better." Grandpa Meng smiled, stood up from the chair, and walked a couple of steps.
Song Feng didn't answer. He picked up a cup and walked into the kitchen. Honestly, he shouldn't have asked such a question, just like asking them if they weren't hot without turning on the AC. Because the answers would always be "Not hot," "Much better," and "Very well."
After filling a cup with hot water, Song Feng took a packet of medicine from the bag, dissolved it, and placed it in front of his grandfather. "Drink it while it's hot."
Grandpa Meng looked at the cup of medicine, then at the packaging bag. "Is this the kind of medicine I took a while ago?"
"You still know that." Song Feng's tone wasn't very pleasant, carrying quite a bit of that scolding-a-child vibe.
Realizing he was in the wrong, Grandpa Meng gave a guilty, sheepish smile.
"How many times do I have to say it? Tell me when your medicine runs out. Look at how well it worked when you took it a while ago—instead, the medicine ran out and you didn't even say a word, so now that you've stopped taking it for a bit, the cough is back." It was rare for Song Feng to be this naggy and serious.
Over the past few days in the middle of the night, Song Feng had frequently heard coughing from the next room. If he hadn't checked the medicine cabinet yesterday, he wouldn't even have known the medicine was gone.
"Your grandmother said this is someone's folk remedy, they don't have it at the regular pharmacy, and it's quite a trip to go buy it." The medicine was a bit hot, and Grandpa Meng took a small sip.
Song Feng glanced at his grandfather, then lowered his gaze. How could he not know? His grandfather's biggest fear in life was being a burden to others, always keeping everything bottled up inside.
"It's just in the neighboring city; a bus and a train and I'm back in a day." Song Feng softened his tone slightly, pulling the pile of medicine closer. "There are also raw herbs here; have my grandmother brew them for you tonight. You have to drink it even if it's bitter."
By the end, Song Feng couldn't help but chuckle. He thought to himself, here is a man in his sixties or seventies, yet he's still acting just like a kid who's afraid of bitterness.
Grandpa Meng looked at the cup of medicine, his eyes suddenly holding much more than just a smile, before letting out a long sigh. "Xiaofeng, it's Grandpa who's holding you back."
Song Feng was just about to sort the rest of the medicine when those words hit him like ants gnawing at his heart, freezing his movements entirely.
Yet very quickly, he resumed sorting the medicine as if nothing had happened, his tone reverting to his usual lazy casualness. "What are you letting your imagination run wild for now?"
Grandpa Meng didn't speak.
"Is it because you're too idle at home?" Song Feng put the organized medicine box under the coffee table and sat down opposite his grandfather. "Go to the park with Grandma and chat with the old folks. What's the point of hugging a book at home all day? Besides, you've already read this book five or six times."
Grandpa Meng glanced at the book. "Classics require repeated study."
Song Feng chuckled. On the table was a very old copy of *Dream of the Red Chamber*. They were supposed to be having a heavy, sorrowful conversation, but when it came to books, the old man wouldn't yield an inch.
"Fine, read it as many times as you want. But when I went to pick up the medicine today, I noticed the areas around Yangcheng look pretty nice. How about we go take a stroll together one of these days when it's not so hot?" Song Feng asked.
Grandpa Meng was still drinking his medicine. "Alright, I'll ask your grandmother about it tonight."
"Then I'm heading back to the shop. Call me if you need anything." Song Feng prepared to leave.
"Watch your head on the way, remember to eat dinner tonight." Grandpa Meng watched his grandson's retreating back with a sense of trance. In the blink of an eye, he had grown this big, and he was looking more and more like his father.
Song Feng walked to the entryway, but his heart remained weighed down by those words, heavy enough to... Stopping in the entryway for a few seconds, Song Feng turned back and sat down beside his grandfather.
"I saw Yu Zhiyi today, and I don't feel like I'm living a bad life. Everyone has different pursuits; I happen to like this kind of low-pressure, leisurely life. Though I can't make a fortune, I'm not lacking for anything either. Besides, back in high school I was the one who didn't apply myself, and those final grades were honestly unwatchable. Stop flattering yourself and don't sit at home overthinking things. Go out and walk around with Grandma when you have time."
Song Feng stepped out of the house just as the sky suddenly turned overcast. He let out a long breath as he gazed at the gray, gloomy sky.
Although his grandfather wasn't fond of crowds and rarely talked much, he was deeply observant and sensitive. Song Feng had no idea how he had picked up on it and suddenly blurted out those words.
Holding you back.
Those two words made it hard for Song Feng to breathe. His grandfather's greatest fear in life was troubling or burdening others.
Song Feng rode his bicycle out of the residential complex. The air was thick with the scent of dust and approaching rain; there was hardly any breeze—it was that eerie calm before a torrential downpour.
Those words were meant for his grandfather, but even more so, they were meant for himself. If he had harbored any lingering unwillingness in the past, after these few years, Song Feng had zero regrets, because he knew exactly what he wanted.
Shu Dong saw off her last customer, but when she went downstairs, there was no sign of Yu Zhiyi. She called him, and he said he was already at home. When Shu Dong offered to go find him for dinner together, he turned her down as well.
The call had already ended. Shu Dong stared at the name on the screen: Zhiyi.
She looked at it quietly for a long time before putting her phone away.
A little past six, with no more customers coming in, Shu Dong prepared to close up shop and go home. But just as she finished packing her things, rain suddenly poured down outside the window.
Song Feng had only ridden halfway when the rain caught him without warning, coming down heavier and heavier. He sped up, but his clothes were already soaked through.
Taking a shortcut down another street, as he passed the tattoo shop, Song Feng happened to see her walking out and immediately stopped.
Dropping his bicycle in the rain, Song Feng walked straight toward her.
Just as Shu Dong was about to lock the door, someone grabbed her arm and spun her around forcefully. Frowning in annoyance, she found herself looking at his completely soaked figure. A momentary stun gave way to coldness in her gaze.
Shu Dong: "Let go."
Song Feng didn't let go, lowering his gaze to look at her expressionlessly. The water dripping from his body had already dampened her clothes.
Her shoulders were gripped tightly in his hands. Shu Dong didn't know how much strength he was using, but it hurt enough to make her teeth chatter. Yet, her expression remaining unchanged, she repeated, "Let go."
Song Feng still didn't loosen his grip; instead, he increased the pressure of his hand by a fraction.
At this very moment, he really wanted to crush her to pieces just to wake her up.
"What do you even see in him?" Unlike the harsh grip of his hands, Song Feng asked very softly.
Because of the pain, Shu Dong's breathing turned ragged, but it was entirely swallowed by the pouring rain. She looked at Song Feng: "He is good."
Song Feng suddenly laughed. "Yeah, he's good. And what about you?"
She had almost been on the verge of numbness from the pain, but upon hearing his words, Shu Dong suddenly regained sensation, hurting even more.
The aloof coldness in her eyes faded, leaving behind only bewilderment.
"He's good, but what about you? An uneducated little tattoo artist, do you think you have any way of matching up to him?"
Song Feng pressed in step by step, his words like sharp blades plunging straight into Shu Dong's heart.
The rain was so heavy it created a mist, splashing against them.
He tightened his grip by another fraction.
"It hurts." Shu Dong's eyes were very red.
As if waiting precisely for her to say those words, the moment Shu Dong's voice trailed off, Song Feng gazed at her darkly for two seconds before pulling her into the shop and pinning her against the door. The distance was so close that Shu Dong was heavily enveloped by his oppressive presence.
Shu Dong kneed upward at his thigh: "Get out!"
Song Feng didn't move away; instead, he lowered his head and brushed his lips against the bridge of her nose. "Has he kissed you?"
Shu Dong was still struggling, but trapped within his confinement, her strength seemed completely spent. Listening to the sound of her own chaotic breathing, she raised her head and stared fixedly at him, not uttering a single word.
As if amused by her anger, Song Feng chuckled, lowered his head, and kissed her lips, deepening the kiss steadily.
Shu Dong's eyes lost their focus in disbelief.
Every time she ran into him, things always spiraled out of control.
"Song Feng!" Shu Dong pushed him hard, but couldn't budge him.
"Hmm?" Song Feng raised his head, letting her lash out without it causing him any real pain or annoyance. In his memory, this seemed to be the first time he had ever heard her call his name.
Shu Dong sneered: "Let me go."
Without lingering on that question, Song Feng reached out and pulled aside her clothes. "Has he touched you?"
Shu Dong's expression changed instantly—shock, fear, palpitations, and rage... She wanted to curse him, but her throat couldn't produce a sound; she wanted to push him away, but lacked the physical strength.
Yet, seeing Shu Dong's silence, Song Feng only pushed further, still carrying a trace of a smile. "Has he touched you?"
After a moment, realizing she couldn't break free, Shu Dong forced herself to grow unnervingly calm: "No."
Song Feng froze for a single second. Hearing those two words, he stopped his wild actions. He had expected her to cry, but never imagined she would remain so steady—or perhaps, he rarely ever saw her flustered.
He really wanted to see what her heart was made of.
Shu Dong's face was a bit pale, much like her heart. Although he stopped acting recklessly, the distance between them remained dangerously close.
She gazed at him quietly: "Why are you treating me like this?"
Song Feng paused. Why was he treating her like this?
He hooked his finger under her chin, as if pondering the answer.
"Some people are destined never to be together, like you and Yu Zhiyi, while others..." Song Feng stared into her face, unexpectedly finding a hint of beauty in it. "...were always meant to be together."
"Like you and me."
On Saturday evening, Shu Dong invited Yu Zhiyi out. There was no movie theater as previously discussed—just a simple meal.
As usual, Shu Dong arrived first.
Shu Dong looked at the menu, then at her phone. The last message in their chat window was "About ten more minutes," yet Shu Dong had already been waiting here for nearly thirty minutes.
Just as Shu Dong was hesitating whether to call him, the chair opposite her was pulled back.
"What happened to your head?" Shu Dong looked up and frowned when she saw the gauze on his forehead.
"Bumped it by accident."