Hogwarts: This Wizard Isn't Playing by the Rules

Andy Collins has cracked the code: Hogwarts isn't just a school of magic—it's a graveyard of love lives. Every professor is single, lonely, and tragically cursed. A cat-eared spinster, a brooding bat in the dungeons, a half-giant squeezed into a shack, and a fortune-teller who drowns her sorrows in sherry. Andy's got a plan: survive seven years, master magic, and land a cozy teaching gig. But first, he's got to play matchmaker and break Hogwarts' ancient curse—one blind date at a time. Because if he's stuck here, someone's got to fix this mess.