What Bad Intentions Could I Have? I Just Want to Pet Things!

Fang Qingran possesses an absurd gift: anything he touches becomes a weapon with unique attributes—and every new weapon grants him random stat boosts. Two roadside branches? Now legendary dual blades that make boys weep with envy. A distant cauliflower field? Don't even ask. With each touch, his system chirps cheerfully: [Weapon acquired! Sword Qi +1]. Life is good when you can turn trash into treasure. Then a gust of wind lifts a girl's skirt, and his eyes catch something golden: [Valkyrie's...] [Quality: Gold]. Fang Qingran freezes. He swears he's not a pervert—he just wants to pet things! B…